Hello There My Little Fluffy Clouds,
Today is the day................ The day that I will pay good money to jump out of a perfectly well functioning plane. God willing, weather permitting and if my roommate shows up. I have been wanting to do this for the past ten years.
Don't ask me why I am doing this. I guess I just need a thrill. My parents can't exactly stop me from this, since they jumped about 20 years ago. I did get my hair cut, so I will be flying in style with total bedroom hair. RAWR !
Anway, enough chitchat............
Steve's Nude Memphis Blog is passing around a meme. Well, he didn't exactly tag me. I just decided that I wanted to answer the same questions he did.
Here goes..............
1.What was the last thing you put in your mouth?
Dark chocolate
2.Where was your profile picture taken?
It was taken by Yours Truly in my apartment in Barcelona, Spain
3.Can you play Guitar Hero?
Negativo, bro
4.Name someone who made you laugh today?
My Old Man (dad)
5.How late did you stay up last night and why?
Way too late because I was watching Desperate Housewives reruns.
6.If you could move somewhere else, would you?
Hell yeah, I would pack my shit up and move to Barcelona
7. Ever been kissed under fireworks?
No, but that sounds fun
8. Which of your friends lives closest to you?
Elayna
9. Do you believe ex's can be friends?
I really don't. As Miranda from Sex And The City said: "You need not exist."
10. How do you feel about Dr Pepper?
The same way I do about other sodas. I stay away from them. Liquid Satan.
11. When was the last time you cried?
On Monday. Aunt Flo arrived and I even cried at a scene in Desperate Housewives.
12. Who took your profile picture?
Moi
13. Who was the last person you took a picture of?
Probably my friend Ashleigh
14. Was yesterday better than today?
Today is still young. I hope it will be better than yesterday.
15. Can you live a day without TV?
I have to, as I really don't have TV in my new place.
16. Are you upset about anything?
Not really, I don't have a lot to complain about right now. I thank God for what I have in my life right now.
17. Do you think relationships are ever really worth it?
Absolutely
18. Are you a bad influence?
I totally am around little kids. I don't like toning down language and speaking in Disney terms and shitting rainbows.
19. Night out or night in?
I really could use a night out.
20. What items could you not go without during the day?
Toilet, toothbrush, chapstick, sugar
21. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital?
My mother, and I hope I don't have to set foot in another one for a while.
22. What does the last text message in your inbox say?
Air For Life
23. How do you feel about your life right now?
Thankful for the most part, but I still feel my life is stale.
24. Do you hate anyone?
No
25. If we were to look in your Facebook inbox, what would we find?
Senorita no esta en Facebook.
26. Say you were given a drug test right now, would you pass?
Yes
27. Has anyone ever called you perfect before?
Yes
28. What song is stuck in your head?
Danger Zone
29. Someone knocks on your window at 2:00 a.m., who do you want it to be?
It better be a ghost, because I live on the fourth floor
30.Wanna have grandkids before you’re 50?
Hahaha, I don't even have children.
31. Name something you have to do tomorrow?
Probably take a nice dump. I should go eat an apple right now.
32. Do you think too much or too little?
Sometimes I overthink situations, and sometimes I lose common sense and don't think enough. Neither of those is a good option.
Sunday, February 28, 2010
Thursday, February 25, 2010
And Seven More, Because I am a Blog Whore...........
Hello There My Little Whining Puppies,
So........... I went to my Make Senorita Cry Like a little Bitch class this morning. I spotted Mr. I Birthed A Whale from yesterday's post, walking by our studio with a latte in his hand. He walked right by and did not go in. I smiled and said hello and he smiled back and said hello. It almost seemd that there was a mutual understanding between us. He would not do situps with his legs in the air and moan like cow about to give birth, and I would not laugh.
Anywho, enough chitchat. Let's get down to business. One of my favorite new followers The Pipster nominated me for an award, the Kreative Blog Award, which I proudly displayed on the sidebar. This was the second time I was nominated for this award. So instead of quietly and graciously accepting the award, I am going to proudly talk about it. The terms of accepting this award are to tell you all 7 things about Yours Truly and nominate seven more of youlittle helpless furballs for this award.
Here are my 7 things...........
1.) I have a birthmark on my right asscheck. Now I can be properly identified. You're welcome :)
2.) I love to light matches for no reason. I could go through boxes without much thought.
3.) Some disgusting things I love the smell of:
- Gasoline
- Freshly lit cigarettes
- Uhu glue
- White out
- Sharpie pens
-Freshly stricken matches
NO, I do not sniff for recreation..............
4.) I can belch like a grown man. Do not cross me, because I will outbelch you. Just ask my parents and my friends. But, I wouldn't do it in front of a man I find attractive. When out with a man, I turn into a lady.
5.) Growing up, I was into Tae Kwon Do for about 15 years. I never really liked it, and thus moved on to bellydance as soon as the parentals had no more say. But I did get a hell of a workout and a bunch of ass kickings over the years. I do know how to properly fall. My mom still does it, and can probably kick your ass and maybe even your mother's ass.
6.) Up until high school, I used to talk with a lisp. I totally got teased for it. Hell, I would have laughed at me. The fat kid used to compare me to Sylvester the Cat and tease me in front of the class. Until I reminded him that he was a tub of lard and should probably shut up. He did.
7.) I can do a damn fine job of immitating a cat hacking up a hairball.
Wow, I feel so vulnerable and open. So raw and beautiful. So let's group hug shall we ???
Oh and now for the nominations.............
1.) Tom Bailey
2.) Red Shoes
3.) mac
4.) Jimmy
5.) Choleesa
6.) Mike
7.)Paul Nichols
You know the rules. Basically, you tell us all 7 things about yourself, and nominate 7 bloggers for this award.
Please know that if I left you out, it was not intentional. You are all Kreativ Blog winners in my book.
Love, hugs, kisses, and blog awards,
Senorita
So........... I went to my Make Senorita Cry Like a little Bitch class this morning. I spotted Mr. I Birthed A Whale from yesterday's post, walking by our studio with a latte in his hand. He walked right by and did not go in. I smiled and said hello and he smiled back and said hello. It almost seemd that there was a mutual understanding between us. He would not do situps with his legs in the air and moan like cow about to give birth, and I would not laugh.
Anywho, enough chitchat. Let's get down to business. One of my favorite new followers The Pipster nominated me for an award, the Kreative Blog Award, which I proudly displayed on the sidebar. This was the second time I was nominated for this award. So instead of quietly and graciously accepting the award, I am going to proudly talk about it. The terms of accepting this award are to tell you all 7 things about Yours Truly and nominate seven more of you
Here are my 7 things...........
1.) I have a birthmark on my right asscheck. Now I can be properly identified. You're welcome :)
2.) I love to light matches for no reason. I could go through boxes without much thought.
3.) Some disgusting things I love the smell of:
- Gasoline
- Freshly lit cigarettes
- Uhu glue
- White out
- Sharpie pens
-Freshly stricken matches
NO, I do not sniff for recreation..............
4.) I can belch like a grown man. Do not cross me, because I will outbelch you. Just ask my parents and my friends. But, I wouldn't do it in front of a man I find attractive. When out with a man, I turn into a lady.
5.) Growing up, I was into Tae Kwon Do for about 15 years. I never really liked it, and thus moved on to bellydance as soon as the parentals had no more say. But I did get a hell of a workout and a bunch of ass kickings over the years. I do know how to properly fall. My mom still does it, and can probably kick your ass and maybe even your mother's ass.
6.) Up until high school, I used to talk with a lisp. I totally got teased for it. Hell, I would have laughed at me. The fat kid used to compare me to Sylvester the Cat and tease me in front of the class. Until I reminded him that he was a tub of lard and should probably shut up. He did.
7.) I can do a damn fine job of immitating a cat hacking up a hairball.
Wow, I feel so vulnerable and open. So raw and beautiful. So let's group hug shall we ???
Oh and now for the nominations.............
1.) Tom Bailey
2.) Red Shoes
3.) mac
4.) Jimmy
5.) Choleesa
6.) Mike
7.)Paul Nichols
You know the rules. Basically, you tell us all 7 things about yourself, and nominate 7 bloggers for this award.
Please know that if I left you out, it was not intentional. You are all Kreativ Blog winners in my book.
Love, hugs, kisses, and blog awards,
Senorita
Tuesday, February 23, 2010
The gynecologist at the gym
Hello There My Little Desserts,
So lately I have been taking a Make Senorita Cry Like A Little Bitch class. It involves kickboxing and abs. We'll see how long I last. Basically my little chocolate eclairs, the class consists mainly of chicks, and once in a while we get a man or two, other than the male instructor.
I don't know why there aren't any more men in the class, as we do some martial arts. I think, what it is, is that because we're mainly women that they think that it's easy and that the class is for pussies.
Anyway we had a new guy try out the class on Monday. A guy who is older, has a bad combover, and a gut. You'll see why this is relevant later.
The instructor loves to torture us with ab work, and most of it involves us women putting our legs in the air and spread apart like we're going to the freaking gynegologist. You know, the splits in the air, and reaching up to touch each toe.
He also has us open our legs and swirl them around in circles and the same time. And then go in the opposite direction. What was funny about it was not that us ladies were exposing our hoohas, but that Mr. Middle Aged Balding Gut guy was the only one whining and moaning like he was giving birth. All of us ladies were sucking it up and doing it, but Mr. Combover sounded like he was birthing Moby Dick. I thought that was bad, but after about 30 seconds, he then graduated from moaning to sounding like a woman having sex. I kid you not. That was aaaaawwkward !!!!!
The teacher wasn't done torturing us then either. At the end of the class he had us do the Dying Turtle. Which was worse than the previous exercises. If you want to know what The Dying Turtle is, lie on your back, lift up your back at a 45 degree angle and spread out your arms, and then lift up and spread your legs in the air, and slowly lower them until you feel your abs burn. It was bad enough that we were all reliving the gynecologist experience. What was worse was the instructor coming by and opening our legs more and lowering them to feel the burn. What was even worse was Mr. Middle Aged Bald Guy with his legs in the air crying like a whale was about to slide out of his vagina.
I get that I may go to Hell for laughing at that man, but I couldn't help myself. I fully support people getting back into shape, but damn ! You can shut your piehole in the process. I didn't laugh out loud, but it definitely made doing my exercises harder.
That is all for now. Please pray for me and ask Jesus to forgive me for my sins.
Muchas Gracias !
Love,
Senorita
So lately I have been taking a Make Senorita Cry Like A Little Bitch class. It involves kickboxing and abs. We'll see how long I last. Basically my little chocolate eclairs, the class consists mainly of chicks, and once in a while we get a man or two, other than the male instructor.
I don't know why there aren't any more men in the class, as we do some martial arts. I think, what it is, is that because we're mainly women that they think that it's easy and that the class is for pussies.
Anyway we had a new guy try out the class on Monday. A guy who is older, has a bad combover, and a gut. You'll see why this is relevant later.
The instructor loves to torture us with ab work, and most of it involves us women putting our legs in the air and spread apart like we're going to the freaking gynegologist. You know, the splits in the air, and reaching up to touch each toe.
He also has us open our legs and swirl them around in circles and the same time. And then go in the opposite direction. What was funny about it was not that us ladies were exposing our hoohas, but that Mr. Middle Aged Balding Gut guy was the only one whining and moaning like he was giving birth. All of us ladies were sucking it up and doing it, but Mr. Combover sounded like he was birthing Moby Dick. I thought that was bad, but after about 30 seconds, he then graduated from moaning to sounding like a woman having sex. I kid you not. That was aaaaawwkward !!!!!
The teacher wasn't done torturing us then either. At the end of the class he had us do the Dying Turtle. Which was worse than the previous exercises. If you want to know what The Dying Turtle is, lie on your back, lift up your back at a 45 degree angle and spread out your arms, and then lift up and spread your legs in the air, and slowly lower them until you feel your abs burn. It was bad enough that we were all reliving the gynecologist experience. What was worse was the instructor coming by and opening our legs more and lowering them to feel the burn. What was even worse was Mr. Middle Aged Bald Guy with his legs in the air crying like a whale was about to slide out of his vagina.
I get that I may go to Hell for laughing at that man, but I couldn't help myself. I fully support people getting back into shape, but damn ! You can shut your piehole in the process. I didn't laugh out loud, but it definitely made doing my exercises harder.
That is all for now. Please pray for me and ask Jesus to forgive me for my sins.
Muchas Gracias !
Love,
Senorita
Monday, February 22, 2010
For Everything Else, There's Mastercard....................
Well Hello There My Little Tea Bags,
Happy Titillating Tuesday ! Below has always been a favorite spoof of mine. And by the way, I do have a Mastercard, and no, this is not a sponsored post because their rates are higher than my other cards, and that is probably because it is with Bank Of America, which loves tobend over and butt rape their most loyal sheep with no lube take advantage of their customers.
Anywhoochie, I do hope you enjoy. I must say that being that awkward mess that I was in high school did pay off. I never had to worry about moments like below.
Enjoy and besitos !
Happy Titillating Tuesday ! Below has always been a favorite spoof of mine. And by the way, I do have a Mastercard, and no, this is not a sponsored post because their rates are higher than my other cards, and that is probably because it is with Bank Of America, which loves to
Anywhoochie, I do hope you enjoy. I must say that being that awkward mess that I was in high school did pay off. I never had to worry about moments like below.
Enjoy and besitos !
Sunday, February 21, 2010
They Don't Make Em Like They Used To.........................
Hello There My Little Diamonds,
So when I logged into my AOL account, I saw this article...............
http://www.lemondrop.com/2010/02/18/now-thats-commitment-secrets-of-5-couples-married-50-years-o/
Basically, my little wedding veils, this article is about couples that have been married for over 50 years. Not only is the article about the couples heartwarming, but so are the comments left behind by the readers offering up their own stories.
I thought of my own grandparents. My Oma and Opa were the loves of eachothers lives. They would've definitely lasted if he hadn't passed away instantly from a heart attack. Oma lived for 21 more years and remained involved in our lives before she decided to join him. She did have a boyfriend, Tony, who she met long after Opa, but nothing like Opa, or so I am told. She loved Tony a lot, and they were like school children together, but she did tell me that she still loved Opa. I think Tony understood that. He lost his wife too.
Two weeks before she passed, she mentioned to my aunt that if she were to go, she would want to go like Opa did, and she got her wish. She died the same way, instantly, from a heart attack. I look back and I see that there was no way this could have been prevented. She seemed fine, she seemed healthy at her checkups, and when she passed, it was the one moment Tony was down in the basement getting food. By the time the ambulance arrived, she was gone. Now that is love. I was sad she left, but I am happy for her.
As I look back I realize how hard it must have been to live life without him, wishing to be with him for 21 years. But at the same time she had a relationship with us, her grandchildren. And she was optimistic. She had a great outlook on life and found love after.
My grandmother on my dad's side is equally amazing. She lost her first husband to cystic fibrosis. Her second husband, my grandfather did not work out. She is now happily married to my step-grandpa who I refer to as my grandpa. She and my grandpa are solid and they love each other very much. She always tells me how much she loves him and always are sure to hold hands and give thanks on Thanksgiving and Christmas. I know they have their differences once in a while, but one wouldn't know it.
They met in couples therapy when they were with their former spouses. Basically the things my grandpa found unattractive in my grandma, my step-grandpa thought were wonderful. My step-grandpa, aka grandpa is a wonderful man and they have become the model for my future relationships. My grandmother played the role of housewife and businesswoman in her marriages. She knew how to take care of herself financially and take care of her husband and children. One thing I've always admired about her was that she has always been aware of finances and got involved in investing stocks. I think it's really important that women get involved with finances in the marriage and see where the money goes. Open all the bills, write checks, stuff like that.
Anyway, I couldn't help but get a little teary-eyed by the article. When my Oma and Opa were together, he saved up and bought her a ring and necklace set made of smokey topaz. It was one of her prized jewelry pieces and it was passed down to me. So I wear a little piece of their love on my hand and close to my heart.
From watching my grandparents, if I had to give out marriage advice, here is what I would say..........
1.) Always let the other person know you love them. Don't assume they know. Ladies, if your men are providing for you, thank them. Men, if your women are raising your children show them how grateful you are.
2.) If you have a disagreement, don't shout it out in public. Don't call him/her out in front of everyone and embarass them. Discuss your disagreements in private so you can work it out together without others involved.
3.) You can't change the person you married, all you can do is love them for the person they are. If you don't love who they are, don't marry them. Marry the person you love, not the one you think you could love if only if...........
4.) You will never grow old if you do things you love. So get into a profession you love, or find hobbies you can share in together. My grandparents got involved in community service, mountain climbing, church, their businesses, the list could go on. And my living grandparents are still "working". I couldn't dream of asking grandma to take it easy.
5.) Compromise. You love the other person so much, that you just want to make the other person happy, and your partner wants to do the same in return. Their joy is your joy and vice versa. And it must go both ways.
6.) Let the other have separate interests. My Oma had her craft class she dragged me to where she stiched with other women. My grandpa liked to bring cakes to the little old ladies in the church. He is also a Chaplain at the local hospital. Have your own separate hobbies.
Anyway, that is all for now my little wedding bells. I am tired, but I have a dance performance to work on and an ass to deflate.
Love, hugs, kisses and chocolates !
Senorita
So when I logged into my AOL account, I saw this article...............
http://www.lemondrop.com/2010/02/18/now-thats-commitment-secrets-of-5-couples-married-50-years-o/
Basically, my little wedding veils, this article is about couples that have been married for over 50 years. Not only is the article about the couples heartwarming, but so are the comments left behind by the readers offering up their own stories.
I thought of my own grandparents. My Oma and Opa were the loves of eachothers lives. They would've definitely lasted if he hadn't passed away instantly from a heart attack. Oma lived for 21 more years and remained involved in our lives before she decided to join him. She did have a boyfriend, Tony, who she met long after Opa, but nothing like Opa, or so I am told. She loved Tony a lot, and they were like school children together, but she did tell me that she still loved Opa. I think Tony understood that. He lost his wife too.
Two weeks before she passed, she mentioned to my aunt that if she were to go, she would want to go like Opa did, and she got her wish. She died the same way, instantly, from a heart attack. I look back and I see that there was no way this could have been prevented. She seemed fine, she seemed healthy at her checkups, and when she passed, it was the one moment Tony was down in the basement getting food. By the time the ambulance arrived, she was gone. Now that is love. I was sad she left, but I am happy for her.
As I look back I realize how hard it must have been to live life without him, wishing to be with him for 21 years. But at the same time she had a relationship with us, her grandchildren. And she was optimistic. She had a great outlook on life and found love after.
My grandmother on my dad's side is equally amazing. She lost her first husband to cystic fibrosis. Her second husband, my grandfather did not work out. She is now happily married to my step-grandpa who I refer to as my grandpa. She and my grandpa are solid and they love each other very much. She always tells me how much she loves him and always are sure to hold hands and give thanks on Thanksgiving and Christmas. I know they have their differences once in a while, but one wouldn't know it.
They met in couples therapy when they were with their former spouses. Basically the things my grandpa found unattractive in my grandma, my step-grandpa thought were wonderful. My step-grandpa, aka grandpa is a wonderful man and they have become the model for my future relationships. My grandmother played the role of housewife and businesswoman in her marriages. She knew how to take care of herself financially and take care of her husband and children. One thing I've always admired about her was that she has always been aware of finances and got involved in investing stocks. I think it's really important that women get involved with finances in the marriage and see where the money goes. Open all the bills, write checks, stuff like that.
Anyway, I couldn't help but get a little teary-eyed by the article. When my Oma and Opa were together, he saved up and bought her a ring and necklace set made of smokey topaz. It was one of her prized jewelry pieces and it was passed down to me. So I wear a little piece of their love on my hand and close to my heart.
From watching my grandparents, if I had to give out marriage advice, here is what I would say..........
1.) Always let the other person know you love them. Don't assume they know. Ladies, if your men are providing for you, thank them. Men, if your women are raising your children show them how grateful you are.
2.) If you have a disagreement, don't shout it out in public. Don't call him/her out in front of everyone and embarass them. Discuss your disagreements in private so you can work it out together without others involved.
3.) You can't change the person you married, all you can do is love them for the person they are. If you don't love who they are, don't marry them. Marry the person you love, not the one you think you could love if only if...........
4.) You will never grow old if you do things you love. So get into a profession you love, or find hobbies you can share in together. My grandparents got involved in community service, mountain climbing, church, their businesses, the list could go on. And my living grandparents are still "working". I couldn't dream of asking grandma to take it easy.
5.) Compromise. You love the other person so much, that you just want to make the other person happy, and your partner wants to do the same in return. Their joy is your joy and vice versa. And it must go both ways.
6.) Let the other have separate interests. My Oma had her craft class she dragged me to where she stiched with other women. My grandpa liked to bring cakes to the little old ladies in the church. He is also a Chaplain at the local hospital. Have your own separate hobbies.
Anyway, that is all for now my little wedding bells. I am tired, but I have a dance performance to work on and an ass to deflate.
Love, hugs, kisses and chocolates !
Senorita
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