Nasty Dog

Hello There My Little Chocolate Delights..............

So I am back............. I am a horrible updater and friend, but in my defense a lot has been going on. Ever since I got hired back in November, the commute has been horrific. It sucks massive donkey dong. I have also been looking for a new place. I just put down a deposit, but that is half the battle. The other half is the current tenant moving out and then me furnishing the place. I have never decorated anything. Also, I have never so much as even owned furniture, not even a TV. Never. It's about time I grow up a little and be the Queen of my castle for once. 

What else........................

So I have been housesitting for my friend while she's frolicking about in Europe. The agreement was to water her plants and take care of her dog. The dog........... what can I say ? She's such a sweetheart except that she's a little stinker.

So I've left my dirty clothes next to the hamper and she has been eating the crotch of my dirty underwear. I feel so violated. This morning I forgot to pick up my underwear after my shower. I go back, and nasty doggie dragged my knickers and left them chewed. I pointed my finger at her and called her a nasty little pervert, but she doesn't seem to give a fuck.

She also licks her asshole. On my bed. Usually she is busy licking her paws, but occasionally, while she is next to me, I will her some slurping. When I look over, I see her leg is up in the air, and she is swirling her tongue around her little chocolate starfish. Then she wants to put her face next to mine. 

If eating my undies and licking her bunghole aren't enough she has also taken to farting in my bed. It's pretty rancid. I've Dutch-ovened her before. But hot damn, she outranks me by far. 

The nasty combination of the above three is disgusting enough, but thankfully I don't have the desire to beat her, lol. I still carry her like a baby on her back and rub her belly.

Anywhoresies, enough for now. Besitos !

And the Rest Is Still Unwritten.............

Hello My Little Birdies !

Loooong time, not talk................ I thought I was going to never write here again. I was just feeling uninspired to write. I have LOTS to say. I don't know if I have any followers left. I remember Zsuzi commenting and asking where I was last, but I didn't respond :( I kind of fell off the blog wagon and I am truly sorry if anyone felt ignored by it.

So much has happened............ I got a smart phone (thought I would never get one), I bought a new car (other one broke down), moved out of my last place (I still have to move again by the end of the month) and my responsibilities at work changed and my desk got moved. The changes have been positive, hope it stays that way, but it is a lot to handle, and I am not done yet.

Also, my depression has come back in full force and hit me very hard, harder than I've ever experienced in my life. Both anxiety and depression. I used to treat the symptoms, they would subside and I would go on about my business, only for it to return again because I haven't dealt with the root of the problem. It's no longer avoidable. I intend to fight this everyday and do everything I can to beat this. Every morning is another chance to get up and try again. I tried medication, and it made me numb, and while I could function, my zest for life disappeared too. 

Lately I have had panic attacks in the morning where I can't breath and I want to throw up. I want to cry. My mind is my own prison. I feel fine at night, only to wake up in the morning to relive the nightmare, if I don't have nightmares or wake up in the middle of the night first.

I just have to say, I completely empathize with anyone who is going through this. Anyone that has thoughts about not wanting to live, anyone that just feels like there is no hope. I totally get it, and I feel for you 100%. Please know that you are not alone. So many people go through it, and although it sucks total dinosaur genitalia, it does get better, if only for a few moments. There are patches of sunshine.

I am grateful for every moment of happiness I get. Money, riches, status mean absolutely nothing if you are not happy. All I want is to be happy. 

Anyway, time for bed. Besitos, and we'll talk soon.