Saturday, December 31, 2005

I Stole this from Tanya

I stole this from Tanya, here in J Land.

Take this quiz, post the results, and see how much things have changed since then.   5 YEARS AGO  

How old were you?: 20

What school year were you in?: I just started San Jose State University. 

Where did you work?: Red Lobster

Where did u live?: San Jose

Where did you hang out?: Didn't go out much.

How was your hair style?: Long, blonde 

Did you wear braces?: No  

Did you wear glasses?: Yes  

Who was your best friend?: Christina and Shira

Who was your boyfriend/girlfriend?: Didn't have one 

Who was your celebrity crush?: I think it was Ricky Martin 

Who was your regular-person crush?: Some Latin guy whose name I don't even remember

How many piercings did you have?: None.

How many tattoos did you have?: None

What was your favorite band? I was listening to Britney Spears and Ricky Martin

What was your biggest fear?: Failing my classes

Had you smoked a cigarette yet?: Yes 

Had you gotten drunk or high yet? No

Had you driven yet?: Yes 


How old are you?: 25 

Where do you go to school?: Graduated from SJSU 

Where do you work?: Enterprise

Where do u live?: Santa Clara, CA 

Where do you hang out?: Work, home, a friends house. My local firehouse.

How is your hair style?: Long, brown and wavy

Do you wear braces? No  

Do you wear glasses?: Yes  

Who is your best friend?: Christina and Shira 

Who is your celebrity crush?: Don't really have one

Who is your regular-person crush?: That is my secret. But I do have one.

Who is your boyfriend/girlfriend?: Don't have one.

How many tattoos do you have? None.

How many piercings do you have?: My belly button, as of today. 

What is your favorite band?: Nirvana 

What is your biggest fear?: Not ever getting out of this rut of a lowpaying job and not ever being able to afford a better place to live.

Have you driven yet?: I sure am a helluva better driver than 5 years ago.

  Repost This And Pass It On And See How Much You've Changed.

Happy New Years !!

Hello there my lovelies,

Just wanted to wish you all a Happy New Years. I hope that 2005 was a wonderful year for you. It was an eye-opening year for me. A lot of changes and a lot of new beginnings. I was in Europe half the year. And when I came back, I kinda started all over again. I bought a new car and got a new job. And now I am looking for a new place to live.

This year was difficult for me. Not horrible, because I know that things coulda been a lot worse. But this year is when I started to wake up. I learned that if I want things to change, that I have to make the changes myself. In Europe I faced a lot of hardships. I had a roommate that was borderline stalker. I moved out and ran into more problems. So I moved out again and had a blast with my gal roommate. I also didn't know if I was going to get EU residency. I kept fighting till the end anyways and exhausted every possibility until the very last day. I didn't get my papers, but I know I did everything I could. I am proud of myself because I worked with what I had and made the best of it.

I also learned that some people that I fully trusted and loved all my life were in fact, not really trustworthy at all. To tell you the truth, it really hurts. How will I ever be able to fully trust someone without question?  But you know what ? I finally found out after all these years. And now I can start the recovery process.

I also learned a lot in the men department. I learned that I am worth a lot more that I have been giving myself credit for. And as a result, if I am not getting treated with respect, I won't make excuses for the guy. I just drop him. I just let it go.

And last but not least, I want to thank God for a clean bill of health this year. I am truly blessed to be healthy. I can deal with almost anything as long as me and my loved ones are healthy. I can't stress enough how lucky I am. I can only hope that 2006 will be a healthy year too.

Today is the last day of 2005 so I wanted to do something interesting. So I got my navel pierced. I really wanted to do it while I was abroad in Spain, but I never got around to it. I have been putting it off for so long. Plus, navel piercings take 6 months to a year to fully heal, so I was also a little nervous.

So after work today, I just waltzed on over to the studio and got it done. I was tired of putting it off. Lemme tell you that it DOES hurt. They smiled and told me it "hurts just a little." That is such horse shit. Not only did I fully feel that needle, but I also felt like someone was taking my skin and twisting it around until I screamed "MERCY".

But after all was said and done, it looks pretty good. It's gonna be a nice addition to my dance routines.

Anyways, Happy New Years to y'all !

Thursday, December 29, 2005

Happy Anniversary to Me :)

Hello Everyone,

Today is my 2nd anniversary for being in J-Land. I have been blogging for 2 years now ! When I started this, I never thought that I would keep posting for this long. I have come a long way. When I started I was finishing my last semester in school and preparing for my trip to Barcelona. Now school is over, I am home and I have started my career.

Thank you to all of my readers. And Happy New Year to you :)

Monday, December 26, 2005

Happy Holidays :)

Hello Everyone,

I had a lovely Christmas with my family. I went up north to see my grandparents and my dad and his new girlfriend. I haven't met her before. I wasn't sure if I was going to like her or not. But I really do like her. She is a nice, classy, beautiful lady.

I ate lots of food. My grandma makes the best chicken ever. It was so good. I had peppermint ice cream for desert. Yummy. Then we all got together and opened presents. I played Santa Claus and handed out all the gifts to everyone.

I got some cool gifts this year. I got lotsa chocolate :) My dad gave me a bellydance CD and a cool coin belt among other things. My grandma also gave me a nice business suit. Normally I don't like the clothes that people buy me, but my grandma did a wonderful job with the suit she bought me. I am gonna wear it tommorow.

I got to spend some quality time with my dad and his new girlfriend. It was nice. I haven't seen him for almost two years. We went out to town and looked at some shops and to lunch. We talked a lot and caught up.

Anywho, I am gonna sign off now and get ready for work tommorow. Nite Nite.


Friday, December 23, 2005

Scatterbrained Thoughts

Hello there my lovelies,

I am so tired right now, but I need to get off my butt because I have a little party to go to. I also still have to wrap my gifts and pack my bags for tommorow cuz I need to leave early tommorow morning.

Today at work my boss gave us all Sees Chocolates. That was sweet. I ate too many of those. Speaking of which, my new boss is a real cutie. Too bad I am gonna transfer back out again in a week.

I am tired right now. Can you tell ? My thoughts are kinda scattered.

Anywho, Happy Holidays everyone :)


Thursday, December 22, 2005

Scattered Thoughts

Hello there my lovelies,

Not much to write today. I am tired and feeling very lazy. I will be going up north again this weekend to visit my grandparents for Christmas. And I will get to see my dad again. I haven't seen him in two years.

I got a nice gift from my dance teacher. Little candles to dance with. You hold them in your hand and swirl them around. Very nice.

I also went to the mall today. Now I remember clearly why I don't want children. They cry, ball and scream when they don't get their way. Parking was also complete hell. I was so relieved to finally get out.

It was also a very rainy day. I love sunshine, so I can't wait for the nice, peaceful weather to come around. I think it should be better again tommorow.

Well, thats all for now folks. Ciao.

Wednesday, December 21, 2005

Would you like a nice side of bronchitis with that?

Hello there my lovelies,

I missed another day of work today with the nice cough I've been having and my mother was right. I have bronchitis. So now I am on antibiotics. At least I now know what I have. Hey, does anyone out there want a kiss ?

I'm sure my boss hates my guts right now after calling in this morning. Especially since this week is one of the busiest weeks in the year. Everyone and their mother wants a minivan or SUV. Not to mention all the customers from the body shops.

But ya know what? I wouldn't have been very useful at work anyways had I showed up. So I did everyone a favor and stayed home. But I do have a doctors note to bring tommorow to prove that I really was sick. I don't call in sick unless I really am. I am a real bad liar.

Anyways, thats all for now. Ciao. :)


Monday, December 19, 2005

Just Rambling

Hello there my lovelies,

Today I went on the most boring date. Sorry if the guy ever finds out that I said this, but whatever. I am willing to take that risk. Not really his fault. There was absolutely NO chemistry whatsoever. Not only that but there were many moments of silence. And I also had to initiate a lot of conversation. Never have I looked forward to going home so soon. So very awkward.

My love life is horrible. It is full of men that are really nice and outgoing to me at first, but end up being emotionally unavailable a couple of weeks later and disappear. Its also full of men that I have no chemistry with. Once in a blue moon I meet a guy thats a complete jerk. At least I have had a few really good dates in between. At least not all is lost.

I can't complain anymore. This is something I've accepted and I am willing to live the rest of my life like this. Because I keep going out with the best of intentions. And I keep my head up and hope that I'll meet someone that I at least click with. I am not even really looking for a relationship right now. Just a good person that I click with. And it hasn't happened. And it may never will. And I realized that after today I would be okay with that because I know how to take care of myself. And besides, I have wasted enough time wondering.

I know that its just not the right time for me right now. Thats obvious because I am always met with bad luck. Who knows what the man up above has in store for me. I wish I knew.

My life is in transition and I am very confused. Sometimes I feel like I may never get it together. It is so hard to earn a decent living. I can can't even afford my own room. I SO miss having my own place with my own large bed. My job pays so little. I work my ass off and make no commissions on what I sell. Not to mention that I have to clean cars in my business suit and high heels. A lot of my paycheck goes to my student loans and other bills and my 401K. I am saving up for retirement but I really could use all that money right now.

I don't know if it will get any better.

I am gonna go now. This is not a pity party and I am not looking for charity here. I honestly just don't know where my life is headed. And I just needed to express my frustrations. Once in a while I just wanna break down and lose my shit. But I know there are a lot of people in my situation too, so I know I am not alone.

Byefor now.

Sunday, December 18, 2005


Hello All,

Check out the about link. That's a music video that I used to watch all the time while I was in Barcelona. And it just brought back tons of memories.

Like memories I had of all my hopes and dreams for myself while I was there. Memories of me taking little weekend trips by myself.

Or memories of me just daydreaming about other European countries I could visit over the weekend. Unfotunately that never happened because I was too broke.

And last but not least, memories of all the times I was fed up and wanted to come to the US so bad. Memories of me feeling helpless in a foreign country, looking out from my balcony or crying in my bed.

The truth is that I kinda miss those feelings. Of course homesickness is hard. Don't get me wrong, I don't like being miserable. But at the same time, while I was traveling I felt like I was accomplishing something. I was becoming a stronger person for having to solve all my problems in a foreign country all on my own. Not to mention that I was really improving my Spanish speaking skills.

I am back home now and very happy with the fact that I am legally able to work here, and that I am a citizen here and speak the language. I am back in my comfort zone. And I won't be going anywhere for a while because my financial situation is a sad case.

But I know I will be traveling again in the future, this time a little wiser the second time around.

Saturday, December 17, 2005

So So So So Lazy

Hello All,

I haven't left the house today. I did a few productive things, like a little laundry, wrapping christmas gifts, paying my bills............... But mainly I slept, read and was on My Space. Shoot, I am still in my pajamas. I was so exhausted from the week.

I guess I will get out of the house tommorow. I have dance practice tommorow. Speaking of which, I want to buy a bigger, badder sword to dance with. I also want to get my navel pierced. But I should wait until I get flatter abs for that.

Anyways, enough chit chat for now. I shall post more later. Ciao.

Friday, December 16, 2005

Juvenile Things I did Today

Hello there, my lovelies................

Yes, I am immature and childish. I have a pottymouth, and twisted sense of humor. That is established. I could go on and blame my father for these traits, but I am a big girl now. So I accept responsibility for that. I am sure my old man would appreciate that. Love you, Dad !

With that said, I want to confess to some stuff I did today. I made reservations on my company's website using dirty names. Either that or I made reservations under my coworkers names and numbers. I know my old boss will have his panties in a twist over that. I remember his reaction when the guys at another branch did it to him. Priceless. So I think he will be expecting Mr. Long Dong when the branch first opens. Oh, did I mention that we recently had a guy named Mr. Will Swallow walk in my new branch ? You can never really tell anymore.

Due to the holidays, I have been eating a little more junk than normal. I have increased my ASSets, if ya know what I mean. And I wore a long, tight skirt to work today, so I am sure it was obvious. Anyways, my coworker and I had to drop off some vans at SJSU and then we waited to get picked up outside.

I was talking to my coworker, so my back was facing the street where there was a steady stream of cars passing by. So while my back was facing the street, my coworker decided to keep count of how many people stared at my ass as they drove by. Well, out off a stream of 10 cars, 9 stared. A couple of ppl honked. One barked, and a few drove around the corner to have another look. There were more cars, and many looked. My coworker told me that an old lady stared. That was come cheap entertainment to keep me occupied until our ride came.

On another note (if you're still reading) I scored a 95.7% on my huge work exam I took last week with about 330 questions. That exam took me 3 hrs to finish. My district manager gave me a $300 gift card to Target for temporarily moving out of my area as well as passing my exam.

Well, thats enough useless information for you to know about me for now. I shall update later.

Ciao Ciao.

Thursday, December 15, 2005

Pictures and Updates

Hello there my lovelies,

Lately, my AOL software completely shutdown so I have been having problems posting pictures. I finally deleted the AOL stuff and downloaded new AOL software, so I am good to go again.

Anyways, here are some pics of my party. The first few pics are of San Francisco as we were driving into the city. We did manage to get ourselves very lost. Once we got to the room we chilled out and relaxed a little bit before getting dressed and going downstairs. We watched Elimidate, which is one of my favorite shows.

The party was nice. Lots of food and dessert and dancing. I got a little drunk early on, but sobered up later. It was so funny seeing higher management drunk. The room was also very nice, especially after dark. I had a very nice view of the city.

I did post a pic of my date and I. I invited him out and paid for everything. It was wierd, since usually I am the one that likes to get asked. When my coworkers found out I went and asked him to be my date, they thought I was gutsy. I really don't know if it was or not, but I really wanted to go to the party with someone. And I did. For a moment, I put my pride aside and asked. Although it was a good experience for me, I won't be doing this again.

There was about 1,000 people attending the party. I didn't even know half the people there. I was surrounded by so many people, but felt really lonely. Has that ever happened to you ? Happens to me all the time when I am surrounded by many people that I don't know.

As you know from my last journal entry I was transferred to another branch. Well, as of Tuesday this week I was transferred yet AGAIN. And this time I was transferred to a new district so I temporarily have a new district manager. Around New Years I should be transferred back into my old district. I know, it's almost confusing.

I feel like I am starting all over. It's so wierd because each branch runs its business differently so although I am familiar with all the procedures, butI have to get used to my new boss, coworkers, and how far they bend the rules. ALL over again.

Anyways, that's all for now. Ciao.


Sunday, December 11, 2005

My Holiday Party

Hello All,

Yesterday I had my annual holiday party at hotel Nikko. I have been trying to post the pictures, but AOL has been giving me hell. I wore a red, satin dress with gloves. There were so many people at the party. There was food, alcohol and dancing. The food was good, and the deserts were even better.

I had a good time, and I stayed overnight at the hotel. It was a nice room, too with a gorgeous view of the city.

Now I am back at home and still tired. I have to wake up early tommorow to go to work. I am not looking forward to that, especially since I don't even really like the new branch I am transferred to.

Anyways, time for bed. I will try and post the pics later. Ciao.

Friday, December 9, 2005


Hello there my lovelies,

A few things have happened since my last update.

For starters, my area manager transferred me to a bigger branch. It's a bigger branch, it opens earlier than my last, and it is farther away. So I have to get up about an hr earlier every day, which kinda blows.

I also finally took my 3 hr exam for work that I have been studying for like crazy for the past week. I think I did pretty well.

I have also had some unwelcome visitors in my room for the past couple of days: ants. Since it's cold and I've left out a tea cup before with nothing happening, I never guessed that I would have a nice trail of ants next to my bed 2 days ago. Those little fuckers are relentless.

I have more to post, but I am tired and have lots to do tommorow so I will post later. Have a wonderful weekend. Ciao.

Wednesday, December 7, 2005

I am very tired and lazy right now. I have an exam to take at work tommorow. I also need a damn shower,lol.

Nothing special to write today, sorry to be such a buzzkill.

Tuesday, December 6, 2005

I Have Quiz Fever

On or Off?

On or Off?

LADIES: Turned ON or OFF or DM [don't mind] when a guy:

Rides a skateboard: DM

Dresses like a surfer bum: OFF            

Dresses in all black: DM

Plays a musical instrument: Very ON 

Is shorter than you: OFF

Is taller than you: ON! HELLA ON!

has chapped lips: OFF

Has green eyes: DM

Has blue eyes: DM

Has brown eyes: ON!

Drinks alcohol: OFF

Smokes cigarettes: OFF. Kissing a smoker is like licking an ashtray 

Smokes pot: OFF. That shit smells like ass

has brown hair: ON

Has Black hair: ON

Has blonde hair: OFF                                                                         

Has red hair: OFF

Wears tight pants: OFF. Makes me think he doesn't like women

Dresses like prep: ON

Plays a sport:ON                                                                                               

Has an accent: ON

Can pick you up:ON !!                                                                            

Works out: Definitely an ON !!                                                          

Smiles a lot: ON, HELLA ON

Calls you just to say hi: ON

Is a deep thinker: ON

Lets you know whats on his mind: ON

Has facial hair: DM

wears eyeliner: Eww, OFF

eye brow piercing: OOOOFFFFFF!!!

Has Tattoos: OFF

My Space Is Addictive

Hello there my lovelies,

Yes, I have a My Space. And yes it is addicting. I am starting to make more and more blog entries there too. I am finding people there from my past who I woulda never run into otherwise. Old coworkers, classmates, people from Europe.

I have been sick in bed all morning. I am gonna get up and go to work. I missed a half day already, which really blows because that cuts into my overtime. But at least I am still making something. This month is really difficult because I am making less, but have more expenses.

I was up all night coughing up a lung. I almost pulled a groin muscle from coughing to hard. Explain that one to me. I also almost puked. So this morning I called my manager and asked him to let me sleep a few more hours. And I feel a hell of a lot better.

I am working at another branch for the next few days. I was supposed to go in early today, but I guess that didn't work out too well.

Anywho, I better get dressed for work now. Ciao Ciao.

Monday, December 5, 2005

Are My AOL Alerts Working ?

Hello All,

And the answer is YES ! My AOL alerts are indeed working. It's just that no really leaves me comments anymore. Oh well.

AOL has decided that I need to provide current payment information. I guess I should pay the bastards, especially since I don't wanna lose my blog. I am still pissed that they have pasted their ads up on our private journal spaces. And they won't back down. Fuckers. By the way, my TWO year anniversary is coming up. I can't believe I have been blogging for two years.

My cough is acting up. I really have to get it under control. If I were older I would've cracked a rib by now.

That is about all for now. I don't really have a whole lot to write for now. I shall update more later.


Sunday, December 4, 2005

Dirty Printouts

Hello there my lovelies,

I have been posting way too many things today on my journal. It must be borderline obnoxious.

I have been sick in bed all day. I have to work tommorow so I wanna make sure that I am healthy enough. I can't afford not to make money right now. I have too many damn minimum payments to make.

Yesterday I bought my boss a gift. A book of crossword puzzles. I think he'll like it. Speaking of him, I found some dirty material that he left on the printer. I found it amusing that I caught him redhanded. Here's how it all went down:

I went in that morning to get printouts such as listings for new positions offered within the company, insurance reservations to call in, boring notes of who is getting promoted, yada, yada, yada..........................

And what do I find ? A print out partially titled Dirty Sanchez. I can't remember the rest. If you don't know what a Dirty Sanchez is, I dare you to google it. And while you're there, look up Dutch Oven.

 Anyways, it was a list of the terms of all the nasty, kinky ways to have sex. And it was pretty fricking nasty if you ask me. I consider myself to be pretty twisted, so if I thought it was nasty, then it was N A S T Y.

So I take the printout and tell my boss what I found with a smirk on my face. It was so funny to see his reaction. He bowed is head down in shame and tried to convince me that his friend "made him" print it, and that he regretted leaving it there. I told him to shut up because I know darn well, that he willingly printed it and liked it.

So I tell another coworker about it and have a laugh. But of course my coworker got back to him and laughed at him.

Needless to say, my boss was pissed at me. He yelled at me for telling someone else. I let him yell, but I shoulda reminded him that I wasn't the dipstick for leaving a dirty printout that our AREA MANAGER coulda easily found.

He coulda seriously been disciplined, and is lucky that my area manager didn't find it. He is also lucky that I am not running and bawling to my HR department. But I guess he forgot that part.

Anyways, I better log off and start doing some laundry for the week. I wish y'all a wonderful week ahead.



Results for Meaningless Quizzes I took on to size up my potential

  ***You are a Great Girlfriend*** (I'm not a gf, but I wanted to see if I would make a good one) When it comes to your guy, you're very thoughtful
But you also haven't stopped thinking of yourself
You're the perfect blend of independent and caring
You're a total catch - make sure your guy knows it too! Are You a Good Girlfriend?  

  ***You Have Your PhD in Men*** You understand men almost better than anyone.
You accept that guys are very different, and you read signals well.
Work what you know about men, and your relationships will be blissful. How Well Do You Understand Men?    

***Men See You As Choosy*** Men notice you light years before you notice them
You take a selective approach to dating, and you can afford to be picky
You aren't looking for a quick flirt - but a memorable encounter
It may take men a while to ask you out, but it's worth the wait How Do Men See You?    

***Guys Like That You're Sensitive*** And not in that "cry at a drop of a hat" sort of way
You just get most guys - even if you're not trying to
Guys find it is easy to confide in you and tell you their secrets
No wonder you tend to get close quickly in relationships! What Do Guys Like About You?   

Well, I gotta say that I scored pretty well on these, and I answered them honestly. But I don't know if I would go as far as saying that I have a PHD in men. Otherwise I would have the gentlemen all banging on my door,lol.   Anyhow, this provided me with a cheap thrill for about 30 minutes. Ladies, please take these quizzes and post them in the comments section. I am dying to know the other results.   Ciao :)      

I Stole this off a friend and made my revisions. This is dedicated to the many good women out there.

-To every girl who is looking for true love.

-To every girl that is herself no matter what. LOL, I am almost to a fault

-To every girl that dresses cute not skanky

-To every girl who wants to be called beautiful not hot. Well, I don't mind being called hot. Being hot is not such a bad thing, you know.

-To every girl that will spend her whole day looking for the perfect birthday present for you. Um, I dunno about the whole day. I am pretty resourceful and usually get done faster.

-To every girl who gets her heart broken because he chose the whore instead. Well, this tends to happen to me a lot, but I look at is as a blessing that he didn't choose me.

-To every girl who is nice to everyone no matter who they are. I consider this to be one of my flaws.

-To every girl that would die to have a decent boyfriend. Well, I wouldn't go so far as to die for one. But yes, it would be nice.

-To every girl that wont settle for the jerk.

-To every girl who would just like once to be treated like a princess. More than once wouldn't kill a guy.

-To every girl that cries at night because of another heartbreak. I cry during the day. lol, okay I'm kidding.

-To every girl that wont get down on her knees and open her mouth just to get a boyfriend. (AMEN!) Woah, no need to elaborate here.

-To every girl that just wants to holds hands. Just hold hands ? Okay, that's kinda boring.

-To every girl that kisses him with meaning.

-To every girl who just wishes he cared.

-To every girl who would just once want a guy to give their jacket up when they are cold. I am usually too cold to offer my jacket.

-To every girl who just wants him to call. While we're at it, how about calling when he says he will, not like a week later.

-To every girl who wastes her day waiting by the phone. Sorry, but I don't waste my day by the phone. I have a living to make.

-To every girl that just wants to cuddle.

-To every girl that just wants to sleep (no sex) with him. I am sorry, but I don't see men doing this anything soon,lol.

-To every girl that is scared to put her heart out there again because she has been hurt so many times.

-To every girl who shows how much she cares and gets nothing back.

-To every girl that thought maybe this could be the one.

-To every girl that believes in her dreams.

-To every girl that would do anything so she could achieve them.

-To every girl that laughs at stupid stuff when she actually does think it is funny. I AM this girl !!

-To every girl who is just looking for that one and only and is having a rough time along the way. Unfortunately, there are many. And this is whom I dedicate this entry to.

--*To every girl that gave her heart only to have it shoved back in her face. Luckily I never really gave my heart away.

This one is for you.

-----If you are a nice girl repost this: Title; "nice girls finish last"

-----If you are a guy that thinks every girl should try to encompass even a few of these things.....repost it with the title "I am looking for this girl

Saturday, December 3, 2005

Saturday Update

Hello All,

Today I worked and like always, I was busy. But I got through it all right and people were nice to me. I had 3 reservations, a walk in and NO cars on my lot. Every freakin' Saturday, I end up renting between 4-6 cars. And when my boss works, I find out that he rents like 1 car. Explain that to me.

I am still sick and my stomach is weak. I feel like I can almost barf on command.  I need to get better.

I also bought red satin gloves and a red purse to match my red, satin dress. I have to say that I look good in it. I am a little slimmer because I haven't been eating much lately due to feeling sick. I hope I can keep this shape till Saturday.

I have a date for my party, and and he better show up and not come up with a last minute excuse. I asked him because I thought he was really cool. But, if he does, I have other people to call. I mean, a girl's gotta have her ass covered, so to speak. And I am no fool. I am sure you'll hear from me either way.

Well, enough for now. I am gonna go and stock up on soups and medicines. Ciao. Ciao.



Friday, December 2, 2005

Scattered Thoughts

Hello There my lovelies,

Today I spent the entire day in bed, mostly knocked out on cold medicine. I have a nasty cough that acts up at night. My holiday party is next weekend so I have to make sure that I am better by then.

I went out last night to a trendy lounge with my friend. I was coughing a lot. I felt bad and the other guys there felt bad for me. Oh well. But I did have fun catching up with her. While I was there I ran into a friend who I haven't seen for a couple of years, and who I often wondered about. Has that ever happened to you ? Well, it was nice to see her and we exchanged numbers.

While I was there minding my own business some wierd looking guy in a leather jacket just sits himself next to me and my friend and decides to invite himself into our conversation and shoot lame pickup lines at us. We ignored him for the longest time but he still persisted. I even politely told him "no, sorry" when he asked me out to dinner. He told me: " I am just out of a relationship and I want to date again. I guarantee that you'll have a good time with me. Well, not like that, but you'll have fun. I am gonna leave you my number." Finally after a good 10-15 minutes he left after he told me "you don't know what you're missing." I was so happy after he left.

Today when I wasn't knocked out, I messaged a friend I haven't talked to in ages. He's in a relationship and miserable, so I gave him some advise. And I shocked myself, because the advise I gave was actually pretty damn good, considering that I have been unlucky lately.

Anyways, I think this will do for now. I can barely keep my thoughts straight. I will update more later. Ciao.

Thursday, December 1, 2005

I am now 25

Hello All,

My birthday was simply wonderful. First of all the sun was out and shining which made me happy. Also, my parents, friends and people at work kept calling me throughout the day to wish me a happy birthday. I also got a little carrot cake. After I came home from work I went out to dinner with a boy who gave me chocolates and a stuffed animal. Those chocolates were off the chain !

Now I am home, its late and I have to get up early. I am gonna try and go out tommorow night with some gal friends. I haven't seen them in a long time.

I wanna thank everyone for the comments and cards. Birthdays only come once a year, so I am happy this one turned out nicely.

Okay, time for me to get my ass to bed now. Long day tommorow. Luckily pay day is only two days away.


Tuesday, November 29, 2005

Last Day Being 24

Hello there my lovelies :)

Today is the last day that I am 24 years old. Tommorow is my birthday and I have done a lot of thinking lately.

A lof of my peers have their lives planned out or know what they want. And I don't. Everything in my life is up in the air right now. I can't even plan for the next month. I don't even know what I really want. I was hoping that by the time I turned 25 I would have some things accomplished. I was hoping that I would at least have a job that pays well. I was also hoping to have my own place and a some money to spend on vacation.

I have a job that doesn't pay well, and I am in debt. I still don't have my own place, and I am broke. Let's not even get into my dating situation. Anyways, I am changing the subject now.

Today was my last day with my old bellydance teacher. I didn't even say goodbye to her. I just got up and left near the end of class. I am mad at her. I really thought she was a nice woman before she told the rest of the class that I am not group dance material behind my back. Of course she tried to talk her way out of it a few days ago but I really don't believe her. So I won't give her a second chance. I am sure I won't be missed anyways.

I found another teacher to start with next week. I might also look in to Latin dance or hip hop in addition to my bellydance lessons.

Anyways, I am gonna think about going to bed now. Good Night.


Monday, November 28, 2005

Mondays are a real drag

Hello there my lovelies,

I was really enjoying my Thanksgiving vacation, so going back to work today wasn't all that fun. Plus I got a cold over the break so I am now coughing up lung cheese.

I was in a good mood for the most part and the day flew by, which was nice.

It was rainy and cold today, and there will be alot more of it too, so I am just gonna deal with it. I miss the sunshine already.

The lady that rearended me a couple of weeks ago is trying to weasle her way out of being held responsible for hitting me. I'd like to see how this goes down.

This bitch rearended me while my car was stopped and the blinker was on. What does she do when she gets out of the car ? She appologizes and tells me that she didn't see me. Sounds like she's liable to me. Now she's trying to say that I cut in front of her. How the hell do I pull that off if my car is completely stopped ? Luckily she hit me while I was on the job. So this means that she gets to deal with my loss control department, who is gonna do everything they can to get her to pay.

The funny part is that she's renting a car from me, so I have to make sure she is completely happy with her rental experience. I am not helping her anymore. I am gonna make my boss deal with her. She has some nerve.

On another note, I went to the eye doctor and he put plugs in my eye to help me retain water better in my eyes, so they are less irritated when I wear contacts. He had to numb my eyes and kinda poke around the inside of my lower eye lids. It was wierd. I hope I have an easier time with my contacts.

Anyways, that's enough for now. I shall update more later. Ciao.

Sunday, November 27, 2005

I stole this quiz from Deanna

*Do you shower in the morning or at night? Usually at night.

*What is your favorite salad dressing? Olive oil.

*Do you prefer a car or truck? Car

*paper or plastic? Paper

 *hamburger or hotdog? Hotdog

*credit or debit? Debit

*Do you have any piercings/tattoos? Nope

*Have you ever colored your hair I was blonde for 2 years.

*Have you ever tepeed a house? Nope.

 *n64 or ps2? Sorry, neither.

*Favorite color? Blue

*Favorite metal? Gold or silver

*Favorite actress? Don't really have one.

*Favorite book? Dan Brown books

*Favorite Foods? Spanish or Asian

*Favorite time of the year? Thanksgiving

*Favorite day of the week? Saturday, Thrursday

*morning or night person? I'm a night owl.

*What is one thing that irritates you?  People that talk behind my back. People that talk in the movie theater.

 *Describe a hobby and what inspires you to do it? Bellydancing. I get inspired every time I watch a dance video or see a bellydancer perform.

*What two personality trait's that really impresses you in others? Honesty and loyalty. And I mean that.

*What two personality trait's that really irritates you in people? People that lie and don't do what they say they will.

*what color is your bathroom?White

 *How many keys do you carry? I actually don't know. 

*Where would you like to retire? I don't wanna retire.

*Favorite kind of cars? Mercedes Benz and the Chrysler 300.

*Favorite flowers? Roses.

*What is one thing that makes you really happy? Getting my dance moves right, sitting in the sun, my family lavishing me with attention

*Do you drink alcohol?NO

*Favorite non alcoholic drink? Nestea Iced tea

*How did you celebrate your last birthday? Had cake and opened presents.

*Do you carry a donor card?no

*Do you volunteer or donate anything? When I can

 *What pet do you prefer?a dog

*Are you a good cook? No, but I can make chocolate chip cookies that will knock your socks off.

*Favorite movies? Two can play that game, Deuce Bigalow, foreign films in Spanish.

*Favorite actor? Jim Carrey, Rob Schneider

 *Favorite t.v. showsApprentice, Desperate Housewives, The People's Court

 *Favorite sportI love to ski, ice skate and bellydance

*Fav. team?none

*Favorite cartoon?Good ole' Looney Toons

 *Favorite character?Goofy, Donald, Tweety, Bugs

*Favorite kind of ice cream?Mint Chocolate Chip.

*Favorite cookie? Chewey, moist chocolate chip cookies

*Favorite chips? BBQ potato chips, sour cream and onion.

*How many kids?None 

*Favorite holiday?Thanksgiving

 *Favorite #? 7

*Favorite singer?Mariah Carey, Jessica Simpson

*Favorite place? I love to chill in the middle of downtown San Jose.

*Favorite Clothing? Victoria's Secret

*Favorite store?Walmart, Target, Victoria's Secret, Bath and Body Works.

*Favorite time of day? 5pm

The Beauty I Found in Mendocino



I had a wonderful Thanksgiving. I went up to see my family in Northern CA. I saw my grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins. I had such a good time.

I stayed at my aunts house, watched movies, and ate her ice cream sandwiches. It felt so good to get some rest.

 I also got to play with my little cousins. They were so adorable and such a joy.

There was lots of food, and I was surrounded by happy people. My birthday was also celebrated so I got some nice gifts such as perfumes and lotions, and a handbag. My cousin got me a purse filled with goodies from Victoria's Secret. It was so nice.

So I am sure that you can tell that I had a wonderful Thanksgiving weekend. I was disappointed a little because my old man didn't make it this year. I haven't seen him in 2 years so I was hoping he would be there. But I'll see him there on Christmas.

And I am leaving you with more pictures. The big guy is my brother and the little kiddies are my cousins. The animals are family pets.


This is dedicated to my grandma

Hello Everyone,

For Thanksgiving I went up to see my grandparents in Mendocino, CA which is near the woods and along the coast. I took some nice photos that I will post later.

This picture is of my grandmother back in the day. Isn't she so pretty? I found this picture at my aunt's house and had to take a picture of it. She shoulda been in the movies.

For the past few days my grandma has showered me with hugs and kisses and told me how much she loves and misses me. We also followed our usual ritual where we end up on her bed having a girl talk. Those are always fun. While we were in the middle of a conversation she looks at my chest and asks " Did you get your bust from me?" That was def something my grandma would ask.

This morning she was at her computer and she was giving me advice on what stocks to buy. She does all the investing and has been doing pretty well, especially since she doesn't listen to her financial advisors. After she was done talking about stocks, she decided to share some of her funny/dirty e-mails her friends have sent her. Now I know where my dad got part of his twisted sense of humor.

My grandma is 85 and easily has the life of someone half her age or younger. My grandpa is 91 and still takes classes at CSU Longbeach. He must be the oldest student there. My other grandpa is an architect, and volunteers at the local church.

By looking at my grandparents it gives me hope that I am gonna have a long life and I'll be able to stay active till the end.

Saturday, November 26, 2005

Nice people are back stabbers too..............

Hello There My Lovelies............

Y'all know that I love bellydance. I would say that I am dedicated, and that I go to every class I can and practice even more on the weekend. They have a troupe that performs and competes, and I have been thinking about performing with them next spring. Hell, I even got more music and a new uniform. I have been with my latest teacher for a few months and she's been doing new routines. She's been real nice to me.......or so I thought.

So you can probably imagine my shock and frustration when I found out that she was talking about me behind my back after I just went home after class. Luckily my friend in that class called me and told me.

She had a discussion with the other girls in the class and told them :" I don't think that Sandra is group material. Should we tell her ? Or maybe we shouldn't tell her. Maybe we should just have her come to the other class. I think she'll understand."

Most of the girls agreed that I wasn't "group material" and they decided that they weren't gonna tell me.

I have been dancing for almost 3 years now and I am more flexible than most of the girls. I am also a fast learner if given the chance. My teacher never really gave me a chance to learn all the steps. I am also more willing to wear different outfits and try new things when the other girls bitch and moan. And now they want to tell me that I am not good enough. I know when I am good enough and when I am not. They are full of shite.

This is a good case of me not being welcome. That's really all there is to it. They can dress the situation any way they want, but the girls don't really like me. I never felt welcome in that class. This is friggin' high school all over again.

This incident happened on Tuesday. That day I wore my new outfit and I looked good. It was tight and fit in all the right places and without coming off as conceited I really looked good in it. And the other girls didn't share in my excitement. And neither did my dance teacher. I saw that look in her eyes when she asked me if I was gonna dance in that or go and take it off. I smiled and said I would be dancing in it for the rest of the class.

My teacher has been very nice and fair to me so far, so I don't understand why this came up all of a sudden. But I did have a little inexplicable nagging feeling about her that she probably doesn't like me like me and can be two faced.

Right after I heard this I called her up and confronted her. Of course she denied it and is now agreeing to let me be part of the dance troupe. I never cared about the dance troupe. The problem I had was her telling the group that I wasn't group material behind my back.

I don't want to be part of the dance troupe. Half the girls there are mean and condescending anyways. They can kiss my curvy, white ass.

As for my teacher, I gotta say that it was funny listening to her talking to me for over an hour trying to cover her ass. I acted like I bought her story. But I don't. She can kiss my curvy, white ass too.

I am off to find another teacher. Wish me luck.


Tuesday, November 22, 2005

More ramblings

Hello All,

I gotta say that I am so wiped out. I have been busy with a lot of things lately and I am beat. I just want to be lazy for a few days. I am also starting to get a little sick. I just want to lie around for a couple of days and watch DVDs. I am usually always working or practicing my dance moves. But next month the sports center I practice at will be closed for the holidays so I am sure I will get plenty of rest time soon.

Today was a good day at work. One of my customers called my regional vice president and told him how wonderful I was. I thought that was so nice of him. People like him make my job totally worth it. I went out of my way to help him and he paid me back by being appreciative. I also heard another woman outside telling my boss to wish me a Happy Thanksgiving. I thought that was real nice.

I am used to people whining and bitching just to get their way. I am also used to people acting nice to my face and then surprising me behind my back with other problems. And most of all, I am very accustomed to the fact that people think that they're entitled "just because". This is the United States of America. What makes this country so great is that we pretty much get what we want. I gotta tell ya that this mentality sucks for people in customer service though.

On another note, the weather was beautiful today. I feel so lucky that we have this sunny weather for a little while. I know that the cold, rainy season isn't too far behind. I love just sitting in the sun.

Well, I wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving.

Monday, November 21, 2005


Hello there my lovelies,

Yesterday I went to the Latin Film Fest to see Tapas, a movie filmed in L'Hospitalet, a city outside of Barcelona I lived for about 5 months while I was in Spain.

It was nice sitting there with buttered popcorn and hot chocolate. The movie was wonderful. It brought back so many memories. On the screen I could see the streets I used to take walks on, bars I used to go to, stores I used to shop at and products I used during my time there. I miss Fanta and Cola Cao.

I saw a view of the city in the movie showing the apartment building I used to live in during a sunrise. I saw the highway that lead to the beach and airport. Whenever I passed by or was on that highway, I always fantasized about going to the beach and sitting in the sun, or going to the airport and flying home.

I loved watching the characters. I really miss the Spanish accent and their expressions. They cuss a lot, use vulgar language and I miss it. I missed hearing names and expressions that mainly belonged to people in or near Barcelona.

As I was watching the movie, many of the emotions I was going through while I was living there came back. I remember how bad I wanted to go home and how much I missed the USA.

American movies tend to differ from other foreign films. American movies tend to have a plot and a climax, and usually a happy ending. Foreign films, such as Tapas, tend to take a snapshot of someone's life and focus in on it, paying attention to detail.

Anyways, thats enough for now . Night Night.


A Man's Honesty

I gotta wonder why men tell me the stuff they do sometimes. I was out on a date on Saturday and I was having a wonderful time smoking hookahs and dancing to Lebanese music that was off the hook. My date next to me decides to ask me how long it was since I had a boyfriend. I just shrugged my shoulders and said it has been a while. Then he turns to me and just flat out tells me :" I have only had one girlfriend. That's because I always break it off before things get serious." He was totally serious in his tone of voice. So I just smiled, patted his shoulder and said. "Wow. Thanks for letting me know."

WTF? I was out having fun on date #1. I was just starting to make conversation with him and get to know him better. I wasn't even thinking about the next date with him. There was nothing serious about they way I was acting. I didn't ask about his family or if he wanted kids. I was kinda busy inhaling my apple flavored smoke.

 But I gotta give the guy credit. At least he's honest. In a way, I sometimes wish other men would say shit like this so I get a fair warning. My life would be a hell of a lot easier. 

Now I know that if I continue to see him and have go out and have fun with him he will evaporate into thin air. What a guy.

Saturday, November 19, 2005

Last Night

Hello All,

Last night I had a blast. I went out to a Lebanese restaurant and sat outside. The street that the restaurant was on reminded me exactly of my street in Barcelona. The weather was nice so we had a nice dinner.

I had mint tea to drink and my main course was sea bass with a garlic and tomato sauce. For starters I had pita bread dipped in olive oil and oregano. I love the mediterranean diet.

Afterwards we went to the hookah lounge and I smoked the hookah. It's egyptian tobacco that's fruit flavored. I had apple flavor. While I was smoking I was listening to the Lebanese music. The tobacco made me feel a lightheaded and I had a bunch of laughs. I was having fun trying to blow out smoke and look good.

Then we got up and danced. Almost everyone there was Middle Eastern and the women just knew how to move. People take Arabic/bellydance for years and they still can't move right. These women were shaking their hips and shoulders to every beat. They just had it in their blood. And they were so pretty too.It inspired me to practice my dance moves more.

 And I loved watching the men dance with the women. They complemented each other real well. My date was Lebanese, so he had some really good moves too.

Anyways, that's enough for now. I worked today as usual. Trust me when I say that there is never a Saturday without drama. Today was no exception.

I hope y'all enjoy the rest of your weekend.

Friday, November 18, 2005

Chocolate Silk Pies and Pedicures

Hello All,

Today the weather was so beautiful. Even more so than yesterday. It was kinda hot outside. The warm sun made me feel happy and that everything is going to be okay.

Today wasn't that busy at work. And one of the girls from the head office took me out for a few hours today. We went out to lunch at the mall. I had some salmon and for desert I had a chocolate silk pie. That was so so so so good.

After that we went and got pedicures. My feet have been in heels all week, so it was nice to get them scrubbed, massaged and toe nails painted.

I also looked around for dresses for my holiday party coming up. This was all done on company time, might I add.

I have to work tommorow morning. That's gonna be a filled day.

Anyways, enough for now. Ciao.


Thursday, November 17, 2005

Happy time for a happy hour

Hello All,

Well, in my side of the world the weather was absolutely gorgeous. It was sunny and warm. It really put me in a good mood and lifted my spirits. It was spring/summer weather today and Thanksgiving is next week. I guess seasons don't mean anything anymore.

Today I went to my regional happy hour. There was a drawing for $500 gift certificates and two trips to Las Vegas. Unfortunately, I didn't win anything this time. But I have my fingers crossed for next time. But I did eat a lot of junk food.

On another note, I got a corportate account set up. I am also waiting for a commision check from the car I sold last month.

Anyways, that's all I have for today. Ciao.

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

AOL Hell and job hunting.

Hello All,

I hate AOL. I am a PAYING customer. And they put banner ads in my e-mail AND my journal. I can deal with e-mail, but NOT my journal. I could understand if AOL were free. But I pay THEM to put ads on MY personal journal space. The current ad on my journal is Bank of America. I friggin' hate Bank of America. That doesn't sit right with me. It makes me mad.

I have been blogging here since December 2003. Almost two years of my life were recorded here. I don't just want to leave, but I may end up doing it. In fact, I hope that AOL loses a bunch of customers for this. Most companys are sellouts, but they do a good job to try and hide it. AOL is so obvious about it and doesn't even pretend to care. I am gonna have to think about this one.

On another note, I went to a job fair for sales positions. In a nutshell it was so depressing. Pfizer was on the list to be there. And at the end they "didn't show." I guess that is a code for "Pfizer was the best company on the list, and was only advertised there so people would come and give the other lousy companies a shot."

After I left the fair, a guy walked me out to my car. On the way, he told me this after asking me a few questions: "I watched you while you were talking to the companies, and you did everything wrong. I felt so bad. I wanted to say something."

Excuse me ? But after I got over his bluntness, I listened to what he had to say, and he had a point. He told me he used to run job fairs like this and told me all the little tricks. And in all fairness to him, he wasn't rude about it. And we spent some more time going over "what went wrong."

For starters, I am too nice. They don't want nice. They want polite, yet agressive. I have to be assertive and get them to tell me why I should work for them, instead of me trying to convince them I am worthy. They also don't want me to be so available. As I have come to find out, finding a job is like finding a man. Gotta play a little hard to get.

I also learned that though they say they interview for inside sales and outside sales positions, they really only want people for outside sales positions. I was also told not to mention that I have traveled all over. Apparently employers will think that there is something wrong with me if I want to travel all over the place.

To make a long story short, this career fair was educational, and I am glad that I went. However, it was depressing. Most employers lie, and I could see it. I could also see that I wasn't confident enough, and I could also realize that I will probably not get followup calls to come in for an interview. It bites.

Anyways, I am glad that at least I have a job.

Hello All,

I am being naughty right now. I am in bed with chocolate ice cream. Somebody stop me.

I rented movies over the weekend and didn't even get to watch them all. I have to return them tommorow night. I feel like I am throwing money down the tube.

I finally got my refund from T-Mobile. Now that I have it back in my bank account I can run like hell and warn everyone else. My boss has Cingular and is currently getting screwed over. I had Cingular 4 years ago and they really had me bend over. T-mobile and Cingular really stink.

On a good note, my bellydance outfit is finished. It is lilac. I tried it on today and it really looked good. I look like an Egyptian princess. I can't wait to dance in it. I also danced today and my teacher gave me some new music to practice my routines to. Ever since I took up bellydance, I have acquired a lot of Arabic music.

Anyways, tommorow is another day. I hope it'll be grand for you.

Monday, November 14, 2005

I can't get no satisfiaction

Hello All,

I am not satisfied with my life anymore. I am not happy with the way I live, nor am I happy with how hard I work for so little. I am just very uncomfortable right now. Something has to change.

I remember last year and early this year I was so miserable while I was in Barcelona. I had a mountain of problems. I was still struggling to understand the Catalans and Spaniards. My roommate was a stalker. I was running out of money. I was homesick. No company would give me a chance. I was applying for residency and all my plans were shot down. One after the other. I felt that my only option was to give up and just go home. One day I got tired of listening to myself complain. And I decided to make changes so that I could feel better.

For starters, I moved out and moved in with coworkers. I also tried even harder to work on getting my papers. I also consulted lawyers. I found more English teaching jobs to help me put more money in my pockets. And in time I felt better and in control.

I am getting burned out very quickly with my job. My passions are travel and foreign languages. My job doesn't offer any of that. I really want to perfect my Spanish and go to Latin America. I also want to learn Chinese.

I want to make more money. I make jack shit. It is so frustrating to be struggling every month. When my next paycheck comes, it will be all gone in 3 days. Then I will have to suffer for another week and a half without money until I get paid again.

I am sick of cleaning cars in my skirt and high heels. I am sick of cleaning the dashboard with freaking 409. That shit doesn't work. They took away my carprep and the carwash is 10 minutes away by CAR. And then when I get there I have to wash it by hand. And the drain is plugged so my shoes get wet. How much more difficult do they have to make this for me? I just wanna wash a fucking car. I am not trying to design the next nuclear weapon.

So why am I still there? The training they provide is wonderful, and they really do teach you how to run a business. I have very little experience and I need to gain more. My short time span of jobs after my degree in college is my enemy. Plus I am a little scared of putting myself out there. But that fear is starting to go away as I am getting more and more fed up. It's a fierce world out there and I have to be fearless.

I clearly came to this company for experience and a chance to prove myself. Too bad I don't get a cut of that when I do perform.

My friend/coworker just quit his job and has another one lined up. I will go out to celebrate with him. He's gonna be enjoying his little vacation.Well, thats all I have to say today. Oh ! And by the way, I think that I am about to have an interesting journal entry about the male species soon, so stay tuned !


Sunday, November 13, 2005

Sunday Ramblings.

Hello there my lovelies :)

There are some quizzes/surveys floating around that I would like to swipe and answer, but I shall save that for another day.

Today I practiced my dance routines for about four hours. I am slowly getting more flexible and developing more strength in my back, neck and arms. And my waistline is getting smaller and more "hourglass" like. Or at least it looks that way to me. I think that I am starting to get a little jealous of myself when I look in the mirror. If I were me, I would date me. I mean, I am me. I can't date myself. Ewww. Wait, nevermind........

Today I finally had a breakthrough and was able to balance the sword on my head and dance on the floor without it falling off. I mean, of course I have a lot more practicing to do until I get it all right. But this was a start.

And I am supposed to get my new outfit on Tuesday. I just hope it's ready.

I also got a comment on my last journal entry from my cousin in Austria. Apparently she is now reading my blog with my grandmother. And they don't even really speak English. In fact, my grandma doesn't speak English at all. And they still work to understand my entries. How's that for love ? That really made me happy.

My grandma really wants me to have a boyfriend. Last time I was in Austria she asked me in her thick Austrian accent while she was cooking for guests if I can cook and I told her no. "You know Sandra, the way to a man's heart is through his stomach." Just then a man came over and profusely thanked my grandma and shook her hand for the wonderful meal she cooked. "Einfach wunderschoen." I just told her I would have to find other ways to his heart.

My grandma is kinda traditional and romantic and she wants me to have the same in my life. Thank God I am not leaving it up to her to pick my suitor.

All this talk about "mein Oma " really makes me miss her. She's very much European and very proud of Austria and hates the EU and I really love that about her. She's like my connection to the past almost.  I can't wait to go back to Austria to see her. If any of you have any family not from the US that is proud of their roots you should embrace that.

Anywho, these are my two cents for the day.

Saturday, November 12, 2005

Another Saturday

Hello All,

OMG, well today is Saturday and I worked by myself as usual. I overworked myself, but I did very well. This upcoming week we finally have our regional happy hour where we get to eat junk food and drink beer and wine on the company's tab. Too bad I don't like beer or wine. But at least I love the junk food and pool.

Last week I had a serious talk with my boss. In a nutshell told him that I was unhappy working with him and working with him made me miserable. Of course I was very nice about how I worded things. I told him that the way he acts makes me feel like he doesn't like me in the office nor does he care. After all he wouldn't even hold a normal conversation with me, let alone say good morning to me. I told him that although he doesn't have to be my friend, I do at least want us to get along and at least talk to each other.After all, I am human. He said that he was very sorry and appologized and said that he doesn't dislike me. He's just going through personal shit and he wears his emotions on his sleeve. Now he is going out of his way to be nice to me, which I appreciate a lot. I hope it stays like that. The best way to get me to bust my ass for someone is to be nice to me. Simple as that.

Last night I watched "Wedding Date" with Debra Messing and Dermot Mulroney. I normally don't like mushy romantic movies, but I actually liked this one, even though it was kinda dumb. First of all, it was unreal. But, it was also funny and Dermot Mulroney is so friggin' hot. Watching him take his shirt off was simply divine :) But the message of the movie was wonderful. Mulroney's character said it best: " A woman's current love life is how she choses it to be. When you are really ready to let go of your issues, you will move on and find love." (or at least something to that effect.)

Anyways, enough for now. Ciao

Friday, November 11, 2005

I swiped this off MySpace.

Copy and re-post into your own bulletin with your 3 things...

Three Names you go by;
1. Sandra
2. Missy
3. Girl

Three Things That Scare You
1. Dings on my credit report
2. Rejection
3. Disease

Three of Your Everyday Essentials
1. Glasses/contacts
2. Cellphone
3. Breakfast

Three Things You Are Wearing Right Now
1. Pjs
2. underwear
3. um, that's it...

Three of Your Favorite Bands/groups
1. Black Eyed Peas
2. Nirvana
3. Linkin Park

Four Things You Want in a Relationship
1. Not afraid of commitment/loyalty
2. I can make him laugh
3. Honesty and open communication

4.) Gotta have lotsa passion

Two Truths and a Lie (in any order)
1. I have been married before
2. I have never lived in the same place for more than 4 years.
3. I want to travel around the world.

Three PHYSICAL Things about the Opposite Sex that Appeal to You
1. Buffed, manly muscular arms (yum)
2. Nice, olive-toned skin
3. Nice manly voice with a accent. (NY, Europe, Middle East)

Three of Your Favorite Hobbies
1. Bellydancing
2. Watching foreign films
3. Sleeping

Three Things You want to do really badly right now
1. Feel better
2. Not work tommorow morning
3. Talk to mary and find out if we're meeting for dance this weekend.

Three Places You Want to go
1. Amsterdam
2. Egypt or Morroco
3. NYC

Three Things You Want to Do Before You Die
1. Have experienced true love
2. Have a lucratice career
3. To speak 5 languages

Three Ways that you are stereotypically a GIRL/Guy
1. I hate watching sports on TV.
2. I wear makeup, lots of pink, high heels........
3. I love it when men do the heavy lifting for me.

Just Thinking

Hello All,

I gotta say that this week really kicked my ass emotionally. I haven't felt this depressed in a very long time. I remember feeling this low about 4 years ago as I was about to turn 21. The feeling bites, and I do experience mild physical pain. My chest hurts, and I feel like it's squeezing my heart a little. I guess we all go through this sometimes.

This week was very, very slow at work and the weather was so gloomy. Today business picked up a little and the sun came out to shine and lift my spirits a little. During my lunch hour I sat in the sun and felt a lot better.

I also thought about how freaking lucky I am to be alive. I have had so many close calls in cars or in front of cars in the past few years. I could have easily gotten hurt in my last accident. But luckily I was fully paying attention and instead of getting hit and crashing into the huge truck at the stoplight, I was able to steer myself to the right and avoid my car crashing into that 18 wheeler. But I really believe that God lent me a little helping hand that day.

It is so easy for me to think about how unlucky I am. I can bitch about my bad luck with money. ( I really do have bad luck with money, no joke.) Or I can also bitch about my bad dates.

But getting rearended made me think how lucky I am. So far I have been lucky in the health department. I currently have a clean bill of health. I also have my family on my side. Although I bitch about them too, many of my family members are alive. I may not have much longer with my grandparents, but at least they are still around for now. I have the most wonderful grandmothers ever. One of these days I may have a lot of money, but no grandmothers and health problems. And that is very likely.

So, I guess I would say that I don't have it so bad after all.


Wednesday, November 9, 2005



Well, I feel better after venting in my last entry.

On another note, I got into a car accident while I was on the job. This woman rear ended me. It was kinda hard and she almost rammed me into a huge truck waiting at a stoplight. This is the second time I've been hit in the past 3 months.

Her damage was far worse than mine. She drove an Impalla. The hood was all messed up. So let that be a lesson to all of you thinking about buying an Impalla. I was in a Chevy Cobalt and although the rear was all scratched and there was a crack, there were no major dents.

We both walked away with no injuries. I do have a seatbelt mark on my chest. Luckily that's all I got.

I gotta say that I was lucky today. I don't know what I woulda done if one of us had to go to the hospital.

Anyways, enough for now. Ciao.

Anger Management Entry

Hello there,

I am feeling a little under the weather right now. I am supposed to be at work now but I am here in bed typing this. I will go in later since I don't want to lose out on a whole day's worth of pay.

I am feeling a little burned out from my job, so I think taking a few hours off will help me feel better. I just work so hard for so little money. This month I can barely pay the freaking bills. I didn't splurge. Yeah, I did go out and buy a few things. But I should be able to spend a little money for fun each month, especially because I am a single gal with no family to support. And next month will be hard too because of the holidays.

I am also feeling a little depressed. I am confused with my life now. I am about to turn 25 ( at the end of the month) and I don't really know if I am going down the path I want.

I also feel so alone right now. I am not out there looking for someone to fill my void. When I am dating and really like the guy (or think I do ) I almost feel emptier. I feel alone in a sense that no one understands me or has the time to. I can't really talk to my folks, even though they tell me I can. They would never come to me on their own time just to see how I am doing.  Case in point:

Oh Hi dear. How are you ? How have you been ? Kinda miserable. Why ? I dunno. I guess I am just going through a hard time. Well, I am kinda late for my meeting. And so and so needs me right now.

This freaking happens to me almost 100% of the time. And thanks for listening.

Another case in point:

Happy Birthday ! I just wanted to know if we can go out and celebrate ? I would like to take you out for your birthday. Well, I would love to, but I am really focused and having a productive day. Are you feeling focused and getting a lot done? I just have a lot to do. Oh yes, I got the point very strongly.

Hello, I just stopped by to see how you are doing and tell you about my new job. I just got a 401K so I am saving as well. Oh that's great. I have been so busy lately with so much to do. I have so many people after me for meetings. We just had a show. You don't understand, it's been busy. Hey, after listening to you, I just wanted to thank you for listening and understand me. And thanks for taking the time out to see my brother too after he traveled all the way to see you.

It's no wonder I have issues, and problems meeting quality people in the dating world. Just look at the men I've bitched about on this journal. See the pattern from all of them ? They ignore me, make me feel unwanted and expect me to chase after them.

And now let's look at my folks: I don't necessarily get ignored. But I do get politely pushed away, reminded of how busy they are, and they expect me to do all the legwork in seeing them. Otherwise they wouldn't bother. Oh wait, I shouldn't say that. I may get a phonecall or two, if I am lucky. And while I am on this rant I want to thank a special family member for after a whole year of being away in Europe and promising to see me at the airport for ditching me at the last minute. At least you sent someone else to pick me up. Did you know that I had the feeling you wouldn't show ? I even had money set aside to take the cab home. And thanks for not even explaining why.

If some of my folks out there are actually reading this, I will probably get hell for this and told how it's so not true. And how could I say such things ? Blah, blah, blah.  And of all things, how could I just post these things on my public journal ???? Well, I am saying such things because they ARE true, and although I smile and act like nothing is happening when I see you, that doesn't mean I don't feel the lack of love. And besides, I have come to talk to you and given you the opportunity many times to figure out that something is wrong. I never cared about the words you told me. I never listened to them.  I watched your actions which didn't meet your words. I am not an idiot. All I have to do is put two and two together. I know you love me. I am sure if something happened to me, you would feel sad. But your actions which don't meet your words don't show me that. And go ahead and try to make me feel guilty with how busy you are. I do feel guilty, because I see how hard you work and how sometimes people take advantage of your kindness which just makes me feel worse. But I am part of your blood too.

Don't worry, I am not ratting you out here. I didn't actually put names or labels to anything. How do you know I am even talking about you ????

Anyways, I feel a little better now. I am going to have some breakfast, put on my suit and go to work. Then I am gonna study for my work exam so I can kick some ass and get closer to getting promoted.  I am also gonna cross my fingers and hope for some sunshine to lift my spirits.




Tuesday, November 8, 2005

Election Day

Hello there my lovelies,

This entry will be short because I am so hungry. Anyways, today was election day and I went to vote. I voted by touchscreen which was way cool. I will look in tommorow's paper to see if the initiatives that I voted for passed.

I also went to my dance class and I feel so much better. I stretched and then worked on my routine with the sword. I am getting better with the routine. I am more flexible and more able to balance it on my head without getting whacked.

Okay, I am tired now. Good night.


Monday, November 7, 2005

A little something I swiped from someone.

1. Name someone with the same birthday as you? Winston Churchill

2. Where was your first kiss? In the backseat of a car after work.

3. Have you ever seriously vandalized someone else's property? Not that I am willing to admit.

4. Have you ever hit someone of the opposite sex? Yes, in martial arts class.

5. Have you ever sung in front of a large number of people? Yes.

6. What's the first thing you notice about the preferred sex? Buffed arms and broad shoulders.

7. What really turns you on? If the guy is intelligent and affectionate.
8. What do you order at Starbucks? Pumpkin Spice Latte with extra whipped creme.

9. What is your biggest mistake? I have to give that some more thought.

10. Have you ever hurt yourself on purpose? No.

11. Say something totally random about yourself. I am a total dog lover and I will hug any dog that doesn't look threatening.

12. Has anyone ever said you looked like a celebrity? I have gotten Adriana Lima.

13. Do you still watch kiddy movies or tv shows? Hell no;

14. Did you have braces? No.

15. Are you comfortable with your height? No, I wish I were taller.

17. When do you know it's love? When you don't have to ask yourself, "Is he the one?"

18. Do you speak any other languages? Yes.
19. Have you ever been to a tanning salon? No.

20. What magazines do you read? People en espanol, Cosmopolitan, Maxim.
21. Have you ever ridden in a limo? Yes.

22. Has anyone you were really close to passed away? No one that I was really close with, yet.

23. Do you watch mtv? When I am around a TV.

24. What's something that really annoys you? Neigobor's music that rattles my windows, people talking during a movie.

25. What's something you really like? Bellydance.
26. Do you like Michael Jackson? Nope.
27. Can you dance? Yes, I think I can.

28. What's the latest you have ever stayed up? All night.
29. Have you ever been rushed by an ambulance into the emergency room? Nope *knocks on wood*

30. Do you actually read these when other people fill them out? Yeah.

Fun at the Firehouse

Hello all,

I am gonna be honest. Today sucked. I am exhausted and I have a headache. The weather was gloomy. So for that reason I won't talk about today anymore.

Let's talk about last night. Last night was fun. I lived 2 minutes away from a firehouse. Last month I had to pick up one of the firefighters there to rent him a car. To make a long story short, they invited me back for dinner at the firehouse. Well, I didn't go back due to the fact that I am kinda shy.

So I got a call last week from one of the firefighters. In addition to asking me to give him the number to another Enterprise location, he also wondered why I didn't stop by.

So I decided to go yesterday with my friend who was more than willing to go with me. We bought a chocolate cake and gave it to them. They invited us in and we had some cake. They also gave us the grand tour of the firehouse and the fire truck. They let us wear their gear. Next time I go back I am gonna take some pictures.

One of the guys there loves Desperate Housewives so he turned it on and we watched it together. Then I eventually convinced him to watch the reruns of Sex and the City with me.

I eventually had to go home because I had to get up early this morning. They were a blast to hang out with. I also have their entire schedule for the rest of the year and the phone number of one of the guys. I guess I better use it as my holiday party is gettting closer and closer.

On another note, my mom gave me Austrian chocolates today. My grandmother in Austria sent us a bunch of goodies. And I devoured a couple. So so so so good. Austrians sure know how to do desert right.

I also went to the eye doctor today. To make a long story short, my contacts aren't working out too well because my eyes are dry. So he put in collagen plugs in my eyes so that my eyes retain moisture better. I know that women put collagen in their lips. I didn't realizes that the eyes were an option.

Anyways, enough for now. I'll update later. Ciao.