Monday, May 30, 2005


Hello there my lovelies....................

I have come to find out today that I have taken over 1,500 pictures here in Barcelona. I am so proud.

Anyways, here are some pictures from my trip to Sitges yesterday. Since I finally have access to a computer to post up my pics I suppose I should post more.

Coulda, shoulda woulda....................

I am such a tease. I'll do it later so stay tuned..........................

Sunday, May 29, 2005

Sunday in Sitges

Hello there my lovelies..................

Today was nice. My roommate got me out of bed and we took a train to Sitges today. It was a very nice day and I got some really good pictures out of it. Days like this here in Spain make me never want to leave. However, I tend to have more bad than good days here. Having weeks of hell but only having weekends of fun isn't worth it anymore.

In Sitges we walked around and took pictures. We also met this really hunky guy on the beach and took pictures of him. While my roommate was shouting lines at him I was snapping my camera. Now I just don't snap pictures of strangers but he was our exception. Really nice guy too.

Sitges is probably the gay capital of Europe. We didn't expect to run into any straight guys and we managed to talk to two. The hunky guy on the beach and the bartender. Both invited us to go out. We were gonna tonight, but my roomate has to work tommorow and I don't wanna go alone.

I have two more days left here in Barcelona. I have to send another box of shit home. I have already sent a lot. I am gonna send magazines and newspaper articles. I know it seems excessive but those newspapers contain some articles of the most important issues during my stay and I want to remember my time here.

Anyways, I am gonna get ready for bed now. Ciao.

Saturday, May 28, 2005

Weekend happenings

Hello Everyone,

Well, I didn´t get out of the house today. I stayed in and cooked and organized my stuff to pack home. I also worked on my photo albums. I took some nice pictures and spent lots of money on the albums and supplies. It´s coming out nicely.

I also washed my clothes by hand. Our washer is broken so I had to do it myself. Interesting. At least I´ll have clean clothes. We have really grumpy neighbors. So I let my clothes drip water down to their apartment. They have a plastic cover so I don´t think I caused any problems, but if they bitch to us I´ll do it again. I am sick of the old, grumpy neighbors here. They always feel that they´re entitled. Sometimes my weekend sleepins are disturbed by hammering at 9am in the morning.

Our apartment is slowly falling apart. The washer and dishwasher are broken. The VCR is broken. The speakers don´t work. The furniture has been around since the Franco era. I am so happy I am moving out.

I was gonna go to the beach today, but I was too lazy to get my butt out of bed. Last night I went out to the Budha Bar, a very nice bar here in Barcelona with other locations in Paris and NY. My friend was trying to take out money for a taxi but her bank booklet got eaten so we had to pay in coins. And because she doesn´t have any money we couldn´t go out tonight.

We were dancing last night I saw this American guy dancing like a maniac, jumping and shouting. He was a bad dancer, but he was having so much fun that he was contagious and I danced with him for a while. He was dancing for three whole hours. He was with other people and they invited my friend and I for some nice champagne. Nice night overall.

Tommorow is Sunday and I will be getting out of the house for sure to enjoy the Barcelona sun.

Friday, May 27, 2005

Saturday Six on Friday

1. Which of the following do you trust more:  a politician, a televangelist, a lawyer, a reporter, or a doctor?

A  Doctor. They are less inclined to lie to you because they are talking about your health.

2. What's the last song you liked enough thatyou actually took the time to look up the lyrics? Derrumbo, by David Bisbal

3. Which deceased relative would you most like to spend one more afternoon with? My grandfather because my mother told me funny stories about him and he died when I was only 5.

4. What is your preferred brand for:  a) toothpaste, b) soap, c) shampoo, d) laundry detergent 

No preference for any of the above accept for shampoo. I love Garnier Fructis products. 

5. What is your favorite poem? No offense to any poets, but I hate poetry

Tara:  How did your parents select your first name? Were you named after a particular friend/relative/fictional character or did they just like the name?
I have no idea how my parents selected my first name. But I know for sure that I wasn´t named after anyone. But I am thankful that they didn´t give me a godawful name.

Happy Memorial Day to all you Americans :)

Hello Everyone,

Today I went to a school today to see what it would take to be accepted into the MBA program. This is the third campus I´ve toured. Very good school. They are 8th on the list as the best schools to get an MBA in Europe.

Nice tour. Nice Admissions people. But I am not qualified still. I still have to have at least 2 solid years of working experience before they will even think about accepting me into the program. Not only that, but the program is so darn expensive. About 50,000 € for 18 months.

This is something that I am gonna be thinking about four at least another 2 years.

After the tour I went to the Hard Rock Cafe. Good food. I had a chicken burger and for desert I had a chocolate chip pie with ice cream. I am still full.

I also went shopping for makeup. Loreal makeup is sold at Walmart and regular shopping stores in the states. Here in Spain it is sold in fancier stores such as Sephora and you can find it next to Chanel or Lancome. Wierd. With that said, it is way more expensive than in the states. But, I still couldn´t help myself. I haven´t bought new foundation since way before I came here to Spain. It´s been over a year.

Tommorow is Saturday and I don´t really know what I am gonna do. I think that I am gonna go to the beach. Whatever I do I better enjoy myself because it´s my last week here in Spain. I just hope that I don´t spend all day at home.

I was reminded that this upcoming weekend is Memorial Day. That probably means barbecues for thousands of Americans.

Here is Barcelona it´s rare to have barbecues because we all live in apartments. But I was lucky because one of my American coworkers has a private patio on the top floor so we got to eat ribs and not worry about anyone complaining.

Okay, enjoy the weekend y'all. Ciao.

Thursday, May 26, 2005

My lovely day :)

Hello there my lovelies....................

Today I got out of the house all day. I first went to the chocolate museum here in Barcelona and did some drooling. I also bought some chocolate for myself and my Aunt. Sorry mom, i´d eat it before it even gets to you in the states. I´ll have to bring you some back from Austria.

Then I took a little boat ride in Port Vell. Very, very nice. I took lots of pictures and sailed right past my old work office. I used to work in the Barcelona World Trade Center. Very nice building. I saw my old coworkers smoking in the balcony as our boat was passing by. I saw lots of cruise ships. I also sat in some bird shit, but luckily the woman next to me gave me a cloth to clean up.

Then I went to teach my private student for the last time. Very nice guy, and never cancelled on me. He was the best student I had the whole time.

I also forgot to mention that I did some shopping. I bought a nice coin belt for bellydancing and it was really cheap. I decided to wear it in public after I bought it. Some people stared, and some American tourists said that they saw people wearing them in Granada.

On my way back my stalker sent me a text message. He also sent me one yesterday. He knows better than to call me, because I always hang up.The dude just won´t stop trying to talk to me. I mean, I don´t know if I should really call him my stalker because he hasn´t gone so far as following me yet. However I wouldn´t be surprised if he did. He once skipped work and came all the way down to my job ( 40 min from where he lives ) just because he had a bad premonition about me, when in reality nothing bad was happening.

I have just asked him to leave me alone and sometimes I don´t even text anything back. He better not call me or decide to show up in front of my apartment because if he does I am gonna get him so good.

I just wish that he´d forget about me because that´s what I am doing about him. I really have no reason to talk to him. He is convinced that I love him despite me telling him I never want to see him again. Despite the fact that I never did so much as lay a hand on him. He thinks that if he can convince me to see him one more time that I´ll remember my supposed love for him and then we´ll fly off together in the sky, live happily ever after and make a thousand babies.

On another note, I would like to comment that the people here in Barcelona that rent out apartments are so messed up.

The owner of the apartment we live in is an old crochety geezer. He told my roommate before she moved in that there was a dvd player and a music system. Turns out that we have an old ass VHS player that is broken. The supposed music system consists of two huge speakers that are connected to only God knows where.

Thats not all. The friggin´ washer broke. Now this piece of crap was old and used many times before we moved in. Now he tries to tell us that it was brand new when we moved in. Hell, we couldn´t even use the dish washer. You she see the place. It´s old, and all the furniture and appliances are old.

So what does this mean for my roommate ? Well, she put down a deposit of about 3,000€. The owner is going to pocket all of this money, if not most. I am so glad I rent my room, and not the whole apartment. I am also glad that my previous roommates have always returned my deposit or simply not charged me.

Anyways, enough for now. Tommorow is another day or being a trourist.

Ta ta.

Wednesday, May 25, 2005

Random things I did or didn´t do

(X) smoked a cigarette First and last one when I was 10
( ) smoked a cigar
( ) made out with a member of the same sex
( ) been in love
( ) been dumped
X) stolen When I was about 8 yrs old at Nob Hill
( X) been fired
( ) been in a fight
( ) snuck out of my parent's house
(X) had feelings for someone who didn't have them back
( ) been arrested
( ) made out with a stranger
(X) gone on a blind date
(X) lied to a friend
(X) had a crush on a teacher Mr. Malek, my Econ teacher in high school. Half Spanish, half Arabic
(X) skipped school
( ) slept with a coworker
( ) seen someone die I am knocking on wood right now
( ) had a crush on one of your blogging friends
( ) been to Canada
( ) been to Mexico
(X) been on a plane
( ) thrown up in a bar
( ) purposely set a part of myself on fire
(X) eaten Sushi
( ) been snowboarding
( ) met someone in person from the blogosphere
( ) been hxc dancing at a show                                                       

( ) been in an abusive relationship
(X) taken painkillers Two words: wisdom teeth
(X) love someone or miss someone right now My whole family back in the states and in Austria
(X) laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by
(X) made a snow angel
( ) had a tea party                                                     

(X) flown a kite
(X) built a sand castle
(X) gone puddle jumping
(X) played dress up
(X) jumped into a pile of leaves
(X) gone sledding
( ) cheated while playing a game
(X) been lonely
(X) fallen asleep at work/school Who hasn´t ?????
( ) used a fake id
(X) watched the sun set You have to live in a cave to never watch the sunset.
(X) felt an earthquake When I farted
(X) touched a snake
(X) slept beneath the stars
(X) been tickled
( ) been robbed A friggin´ miracle since I have lived in Barcelona for about a year
(X) been misunderstood
(X) pet a reindeer/goat At the petting zoo
(X) won a contest
(X) run a red light
( ) been suspended from school
(X) been in a car accident
( ) had braces
(X) felt like an outcast
(X) eaten awhole pint of ice cream
in one night
(X) had deja vu
( ) danced in the moonlight
(X) hated the way you look
( ) witnessed a crime
( ) pole danced
(X) questioned your heart
( ) been obsessed with post-it notes
( ) squished barefoot through the mud
(X) been lost All the friggin´time here in Barcelona
(X) been to the opposite side of the country
(X) swam in the ocean
(X) felt like dying
(X) cried yourself to sleep
( ) played cops and robbers
(X) recently colored with crayons/colored pencils/markers Isn´t Crayola the best ?
(X) sung karaoke Gotta thank my parents for that
(X) paid for something with only coins
(X) done something you told yourself you wouldn't
(X) made prank phone calls Hahahahaha :)
( ) laughed until some kind of beverage came out of your nose
(X) caught a snowflake on your tongue
( ) danced in the rain
(X) written a letter to Santa Claus
( ) been kissed under a mistletoe
(X) watched the sun set with someone you care about
(X) blown bubbles I chew bubble gum AND blow bubbles with soapy water
(X) made a bonfire
( ) crashed a party
(X) gone rollerskating Yeah, but rollerblades are the best

(X) had a wish come true Yeah, I am in Spain
( ) humped a monkey...ewwwww WTF?????
(x) worn pearls Do fake pearls count?
( ) jumped off a bridge Otherwise I wouldn´t be alive
(X) screamed penis in class In 5th grade. I used to think about it in college when the teacher was boring.
(x) ate dog/cat food    When my mom´s back was turned                                                

( ) told a complete stranger you loved them
(X) kissed a mirror I know, I know, I was only a kid. Cut me some slack
(X) sang in the shower Yeah, but only when I know I am alone
(X) have a little black dress
    Yeah, back in the states                                                                                          

(X) had a dream that you married someone
(X) glued your hand to something Yeah, to my other hand cuz I was so bored
( ) gotyour tongue stuck to a pole
( ) kissed a fish
  Now why the hell would i do such a thing?                 

(X)worn the opposite sexes clothes                                                                                    

( ) been a cheerleader
( ) sat on a roof top
(X) screamed at the top of your lungs
( ) done a one-handed cartwheel...can't do a 2 hand cartwheel lol
( ) talked on the phone for more than 6 hours
(X) stayed up all night
(X) didn't take a shower for a week Yes, I am guilty 

( ) pick and ate an apple right off the tree
(X) climbed a tree
( ) had a tree house We had a chicken house as kids
(X) are too scared to watch scary movies alone
(X) believe in ghosts-spirital

Bad, bad service here

Hello Everyone,

I am supposed to be a tourist, doing touristy things, but I am not. I have been sleeping in and watching music TV.

Today I went to send more stuff home. I went to the post office down the street from my apt. I get there and I ask the guy nicely for a box. He just looks at me and strongly tells me "no". Turns out they were out. They ran out on Saturday. It´s Wednesday and they STILL haven´t gotten any in. Go figure. I am in Spain, not the US.

Anyways, I asked the jerk where there would be another office nearby and he tells me. Turns out he gave me bad directions. So I tried walking further, because I coulda sworn there was a post office on the street. Turns out it was way farther away than I thought. Way, way farther.............

I finally ask a policeman and I found one and sent my stuff home.

I also have to add that our washmachine broke yesterday. Okay, I can deal with the fact that I´ve had no dryer all year and have had to wait a day or two to wait for the clothes to dry. I can even deal with the fact that doing a load here takes 2 hours instead of 1 hour. But to have nothing at all? Now that stinks. Now I am gonna have to wash my clothes by hand. I have no clue where the nearest landromat is.

This is my last week here and I would like to pack clean clothes. Luckily I have enough clean clothes to last me until I leave. My roommate told me that she´d call a repairman to come fix it, but we know it´ll probably take a week or two. And knowing my roommate, I think she´ll forget. Plus I was told it would cost about 600 Euros to fix.

I swear, service here absolutely sucks. I am so friggin´ tired of it. We have to pay 1st rate prices for 3rd rate service.

Anyways, enough venting for now. I am gonna go change my shoes and go shopping. Gotta by souvenirs for my family.

Tuesday, May 24, 2005

Graduation Anniversary !!!!!!!

Hello Everyone,

Oh My Gosh, how could I forget ??????????? About a year ago I graduated from the university.

I can´t believe it. Before my graduation day, I never thought that I would see myself in cap and gown. Then before you know it, I graduated.

And now it has been a year. And the years will continue to pass me by. And I hope that I end up doing something useful with my life.

In your twenties you have an excuse to relax after college. Some of my friends are still living with their folks and working as waiters after college. Then as you get older you wonder where your life has gone.

I am still trying to figure out what I really want out of my life. I just hope that I don´t end up in the same position as I am now.

Last week here.................

Hello there my lovelies,

Yeah !!! Yesterday was my last day at work and now I am enjoying my last week here in Spain.

Yesterday at work I spent most of my time making personal calls. I talked to a friend in CA for about a good 2 hours. I also had nice conversations with my family in Austria. I talked to my aunt and grandma about their recent travels.

I didn´t do any work for my last day. I was supposed to find prospective investors. After my boss lied to us and treated us the way he did, did he really think that I was gonna work, especially when he was out of the office ALL day ? Well, of course I lied. I qualified some of the meanest people I and my coworkers have had to deal with in the past few months. So in a few weeks the sales people will have to deal with them. Not my problem anymore.

The grumpy Australian construction worker that told my coworker to write his name on the financial reports and shove them up his "motherfucking ass ?"  Well, he´ll be getting reports and a followup call in a few weeks. Although he was mean, I gotta hand it to him. He was creative.

The Swiss woodworker that screamed at me at the top of his lungs in Swiss German ? He´ll get another person to help him excercise his vocal chords. It´s too bad I won´t be around to witness reactions.

I am supposed to see my coworkers again this weekend to say goodbye to them. We have worked together for about 8 months. One of them is pregnant and I gave her a present. The other girl has been here in Spain for 9 years and has gone through everything I have gone through here. I will really miss them. All of us were foreigners working at the same place and going through the same stuff.

I have to start sending stuff home to California today. My room is a huge mess right now as I am sorting out stuff to pack, send home or leave behind.

In the next week, I will be sleeping, shopping taking the train, going out........................

I have spent a lot of time here, but I haven´t seen as much as I would have liked to.



Sunday, May 22, 2005

Hello there my lovelies,

Yesterday was not so bad. I went to see the play Real Women Have Curves. I mentioned earlier that I saw the movie which won an award. The movie was set in Los Angeles. This play more or less had the same storyline, but the play was set in Spain to adapt to the culture here. I liked the movie better, but the actresses did a wonderful job.

I also went out with my roommate to a bar, the Buddha Lounge. We dressed up and had a good time. I haven´t dressed up like that in a long time. My roommate lend me her pair of Coach shoes. They were so high that I could barely walk. We arrived early so that we could be sure to have a couch to sit on. We talked among ourselves for a while until some guy used our peanut plate as an ashtray. Turned out he was a multimillionaire from Norway here to see the soccer match. 

 He was with 2 other guys who were investors and he was their biggest client (one of the biggest investors in Norway) to see the soccer game here. The client was a really nice, down to earth guy and made no references whatsoever to his money, which I liked.

Here most people that I hang out with have no job, have the same job as me or have a dishonest job. It was finally nice to meet successful people again. I have also never gotten to speak to people from Norway so it was nice.

Right now I am in Sitges and I spent time on the beach sleeping after I ate a huge Paella. Now I am just writing this in the internet cafe.

Tommorow is my last day at work. I will be so happy once I get paid and walk out that door for good. I can´t believe that I spent nine months there. In fact I don´t know how I worked there for that long without losing my mind.


Saturday, May 21, 2005

Saturday Six Yanked from Jessie´s Journal

What do you tend to focus on the most?
   A.  The past.
   B.  The present.
   C.  The future as you think it will be.
   D.  The future as you are afraid it will be.

Ans: A- The past and the future as I am afraid it will be.

  2. Name three famous people (living or dead) whose blogs you would like to be able to read.

  Ans: God, GTYK, Salvador Dali  

3. How long have you lived in your current residence?  How much longer do you intend to live in the same place?  

Ans: Barcelona for about 11 months and I am leaving in less than 2 weeks-

4. Take the pointless quiz:  What color is your heart?   

 Ans: Deep blue. I usually let things that happened to me in the past flow like water under a bridge. But some things still sit with me deep, like water under the sea.

5. How many of AOL's journalers have you met in person?  How many have you spoken with by telephone?  

 Ans: None

6. RAPID FIRE Question #2:  Who or what is the most annoying: 
   a) Politician- Cruz Bustamante, Al Gore
   b) Late Night Talk Show Host- David Letterman
   c) Color- Shit Brown
   d) Habit- Smoking
   e) Female Celebrity- Paris Hilton
   f) Male Celebrity- Michael Jackson
   g) Television Show- Jerry Springer
   h) Commercial- Ads from Telefonica, the monopolized company here. 
   i) Fashion Statement- Girls with miniskirts and a fat stomach that let their fat peek out from under their shirt. So common among the tourists from the UK here in Barcelona.
   j) Word- Vale (used over and over here in Spain. It means "okay".

My weekend scoop..........

Hello Everyone,

Well I am leaving Spain by the end of the month. I am happy about that because for starters I just don´t have enough money to stay longer. My last day of work is Monday so I will have a whole week and a weekend for myself to enjoy Barcelona. Then I will be going to Austria for 2 weeks to see my family and relax.

Yesterday at work was a little fun. After the boss left we were laughing, making personal calls and watching movies and listening to music. The secretary that was supposed to be watching us was sleeping. I called my dad in the states.

Yesterday I spend my whole lunch break trying to send money from my bank account here in Spain to my account in the US so that I could pay my bills. This wasn´t my first trip either. The first 2 times I tried to do this I didn´t have my passport or I didn´t have the swift code. They charged me 22 Euros to transfer this money. Whatever. At least it´s sent now.

Today I spend a whole fucking hour in the post office trying to send all my books home. After I packed my box I had to get BACK in line and wait. The man in front was taking his time, slowly asking questions and slowly counting his money.

I have been here for almost a year now so I have accumulated so much stuff. Although I am gonna leave a lot behind, I am still gonna send a lot back. I am only allowed to bring one suitcase. I am sending all my books, magazines, jackets.......

Anyways, today the weather is nice. I am gonna go see a play tonight, "Real Women Have Curves". I saw the movie, which won an award. So I am hoping the play will be just as good, if not better.

Tommorow I should be going to Sitges, where they have the film festivals and where the beaches are supposed to be better.


Thursday, May 19, 2005

The Scoop.

Hello Everyone,

My boss decided to let us go today. Can´t say I am too bothered. I have worked for those fucking assholes for 8 months and they didn´t even have the balls to tell us to our face that we were getting fired when they first found out. They had to drag it out and make us wait. Nice way to go.

I am not waiting until June 25th to go home. I am leaving at the end of this month.

Wednesday, May 18, 2005


Hello All,

For starters, I don´t know if I will have a job for the rest of the month. My boss told us that he was gonna tell us the status today, but he left the office all day and didn´t even come back in the afternoon to tell us anything. I am really upset. I can´t believe that he wasn´t even gonna tell us in the first place. Moving desks around and not even saying ONE word. He doesn´t even have the balls to look us in the eye and tell us what´s gonna happen. What a coward. He doesn´t even answer us in a firm voice. He sounds so wishy washy.

I may just end up leaving Spain by the end of this month. I can´t take this anymore. I am not happy, and I am not okay here anymore. I feel so conflicted inside and if I don´t do anything soon I will either explode or have a breakdown. Today was awful. Our boss just left us wondering if we´ll even have our fucking job that doesn´t even pay well. Well ya know what? Fuck this. I have had a year full of this and I don´t have to take it anymore. It´s time for me to go back to where I am fully legal and can demand more respect. I hope that I´ll never end up in this position again. A hooker has better payoffs that I had. Had I known how my year would end I would have never come here to Barcelona. I have worked so hard for so little. Yes I did learn some things. One of them being how to take rejection over and over, being lied to on a continuous basis, being disrespected and just plain being stood up. Yes it´s important to know how to handle this, and I am sure I´ll be facing more. Believe me, the world isn´t getting any kinder. But for now, I am planning on going back home where there is so much more opportunity to succeed for me as an American citizen. I am so glad that I have an American passport.

I know there are some people that I know back home wondering why I even came here and stuck it out for this long. I have had people laugh at me and think I am crazy. I gave it a good shot, and now I know for sure that things aren´t gonna work out if I continue to stay here. I guess I just had to see for myself.

I do sometimes wonder what would have happened if I went to Madrid and taught there ? Instead I stayed in Barcelona and gave it a try. I think that I would have struggled just the same.

On another note, I went to the business school today and asked about programs for a business masters today. I learned that I need to have about 3 more years of full time work experience before I can apply to the school again. It was something to think about.

Anyways, I will know for sure next week if I will leave or stay until the end of June. Who knows.




Tuesday, May 17, 2005

Hello All,

First of all yesterday was wonderful. I went with my roommate to Girona. VERY beautiful. Not only was it a holiday in Barcelona ( 2nd Easter), but it was also the Festival of Flowers. I took so many pictures. The city was so beautiful and so much cleaner than Barcelona.

Today was rainy and cold. It´s the middle of May for crying out loud. And since my bank book wouldn´t give me my money all weekend I had to go today during my lunch break.

The wait was long, and i missed out on time to eat. I also went to get money transferred but the banker couldn´t read the numbers properly. That´s Spain for ya.

My bosses are also assholes and they are moving the office. They weren´t even gonna tell us until the last minute. But we made them tell us to our face.

I also looked at grad schools here. I´ll write more about that later.


Monday, May 16, 2005

Sunday and Holiday

Hello Everyone,

Well, yesterday was Sunday and I had fun for the most part. The soccer team Barça won on Saturday night so there were fireworks in the street late at night. People were honking their horns in the street. It was mad.

Yesterday people were parading the streets with the flag of the team and the flag of Catalonia. People were honking their horns like crazy. I was walking by the stadium where the players were headed. I saw the bus that they were gonna ride in. Pretty cool. The streets were so packed. You woulda thought that the country had won the war. Soccer here is like American football. People would sell their mothers for this.

I also went bowling and I had fun. All the machines were in English. I got one strike. Many times I also knocked down all of the pins except one. My friend beat me of course and knocked many strikes.

I also have a new stalker. It´s not worth getting into much here because I vented about this before. But those of you that know me personally know exactly who I am talking about. He decided to call me and I told him that I didn´t feel like seeing him again. So he texted me and insulted me. And then he decided to call me later and cry. I had my friend answer the phone and he just picked it up and listened and he was crying. In total he tried to call me about 20 times. Then he decided to write me an e-mail this morning telling me that he´s so in love with me and that he will always reflect on the happy moments that we had together and that he wishes me the best.

I never once kissed this man, never once did anything with him. I used to live with him. I never had a relationship with him and I made it clear that I don´t want to go out with him. This is so pathetic. I am not mean about it. I just avoid his calls now and don´t respond. I am really glad that I am going home soon.

Well, on another note today is Monday and it is a holiday here in Barcelona so I don´t have to work. I am happy about that. I am thinking about being a tourist again and taking the touristic bus ride. But knowing me, I´ll probably be lazy and stay at home all day.

Okay, have a good week, y'all.



Saturday, May 14, 2005


Hello Everyone,

I just got back from Andorra today. I love it there. The first thing that I did when I got there was go straight to the perfume shops and buy the perfumes I have been drooling over since Christmas.

I bought Pink by Lacoste and Curious by Britney Spears. Now I really didn´t think that Britney Spears could make up a good perfume, but I have to say that she really pulled it off. Smells really good.

Then I went to other stores. I bought tea, chocolates, incense, makeup, Andorran souvenirs, shampoo............... No regrets. It was so nice to go shopping and have the beautiful view of the Pyranees mountains. I have 2 words: Tax free. But of course you can´t just buy everything you want because the officers at the borders do check. They pulled our bus over and did a random check on us.

I also took lots of pictures and walked around as much as I could. So beautiful.

The official language there is Catalan, but the people in the stores also speak Spanish and French.  No English I think.

I really wish I were rich so that I could go there again and blow all my money in the shops and drive a nice car around. Not to mention the nice spas they have there. Andorra is a haven for millionaires and I saw a lot of nice cars around. I also forgot to mention that there are a lot of hot guys there too. Wow. Hot guys in nice cars. That´s a rare sight here in Barcelona.

Anyways, thats all for now. On another note I am happy that I don´t have to work on Monday. I think that I might go to the beach and try to get a tan.



Thursday, May 12, 2005

Hello all,

Not much to write about today. I went to work and taught English after. Now I am here typing this.

I forgot to mention that I went to the top of Mount Tibidado over the weekend on a motorbike and we sat under the temple. It was beautiful. Nice guy, nice view, nice bike.

Anyways, what´s the point about writing about it now ? The next weekend is almost here again.

Anyways, gotta go. Ciao.

Wednesday, May 11, 2005

The latest............


Well, it is now absolutely certain that I can´t get residency papers here in Spain. If I want to apply for a visa, I will have to go back home.

So, that means that all the days I took off of work, stressed out about this and ran around the city was for nothing. But I learned something.

1.) Always register at the US embassy and know exactly where it is.

Had I done this, I might have been able to get legal papers and travel through the EU legally. Now I have to go home. However, I don´t feel stupid because I really had no idea about the laws when I got here even though I thought I did my research.

But it´s all good because I want to go home anyways. I am happy with the way things turned out, even though the outcome wasn´t what I expected.

On another note, I will be going to Andorra on Saturday, and I will definitely be taking pictures. I went in January to go skiing and I had a blast. Now I will be ablw to go and see the mountains and valleys without snow. Oh I can´t wait.

Anyways, gotta go.


Friday, May 6, 2005

What a wierd day

Hello Everyone,

Today at the end of the day at work I learned that half of my coworkers will be moving to another building. I really didn´t even get a chance to say goodbye to them. I have been there for almost 8 months and they all just left. I am kinda sad.

I also ran into 3 old coworkers today and we caught up. That was nice. We all ran into eachother at the Sephora store.

I need money this weekend to buy food and my stupid bank booklet somehow lost its magnetization. So now I can´t take out money. So therefore I am broke for the whole damn weekend. And my metro pass expires tommorow. I won´t even have a way to get to work on Monday. I hope that my roommate can lend me 20€. I have to wait until my lunch break on Monday to fix this.

I was also late to teach my student. So I tried to call him and tell him that I would be a little late. But My phone just wouldn´t connect me. I kept dialing his number and turning the phone off and on again. So not only could I not call anyone, but I can´t even take out any money for me to enjoy the weekend.

I was a little stressed out when I got to my student´s house and running up four flights of stairs didn´t make me seem any more relaxed. So when I got to his place I seemed pretty frazzled, especially when I was appologizing profusely about being late. Then he decided to give me what he called "friendly advice". He told me that I should relax and not appear so nervous. And that other people would pick up on that and that I shouldn´t be so frazzled. I know that he meant well, but I was still a little agitated.

I smiled and pretended to listen. While he was talking to me and telling me to relax, I imagined myself telling him to go play on the highway. Just picturing that made my heart skip a beat with joy. So therefore we were both happy because he thinks that I took his advice to heart and I imagined him getting run over.

And if that weren´t enough he cut the class short and payed me half. This man is a business owner and he won´t even be a little generous with one or two euros. I am sick of this. I could try to find other students but people keep canceling on me. At least this man has been keeping his appointments so far and is easy to teach.

I am glad that the weekend is here. I really want to sleep in.

Thursday, May 5, 2005

Back to Normal Updates

Hello Everyone,

Gotta say that I love the weather. It´s starting to get hotter and hotter around here. I am sweating in the mornings.

I went to a nude beach last weekend while I was walking the dog. It was my first time ever. And no, I wasn´t nude. It was packed with naked people. People just sitting and letting their junk hang. One guy was running across the beach back and forth and letting it all flop around. It was funny.

I am gonna go to the beach this weekend, but I am not going to the nude one again. Once was enough. I like walking around because there are so many people and I can buy bootleg music. I get all the latest hits for really cheap.

What else ? I had another little breakthrough yesterday. I was sitting in between to Argentine guys and observing the their conversation. I was happy because I could finally distinguish the Argentinian accent, and I could also understand what they were saying. The were looking at the newspaper and talking about soccer. They were talking about the players and who was the best. I love the Argentine accent. It is sweet, light and smooth. They also have so many funny expressions.

Although I am going home and I won´t be getting any legal papers here, I am still relieved. I am relieved that I have an answer to all this and that there is nothing more that can be done. I can go home knowing that I did everything that I could. Now I don´t have to focus anymore energy on this. What´s done is done.

I am planning on going to see the hot lawyer on Monday. I talked to the manager of the restaurant yesterday and he told me that I could still go and talk to his lawyer, so off I go.

I honestly don´t think that anything will come out of this. I am almost sure that I won´t be getting a job out of this, because the only way I could be getting a job is if they tell me to go back to CA and ask for a visa in SF and come back to Spain. And anyone who´s lived here in Spain knows that it won´t happen. But a less than 1% chance is still a chance and I´ve not nothing to lose anymore. Hell, I never really had anything to begin with.

 At least I will have a nice face to stare at.




Wednesday, May 4, 2005

Things really can get worse around here

Hello Everyone,

Well I woke up with three new prospects of getting my residency papers. And they were shot to hell. I didn´t think that it could get any worse. And I missed work. I may have to miss tommorow too, and my boss will probably be upset. I may get fired.  Deep deep down I kinda hope I will. But not really because I need the money badly.

I went to the first place and handed in my resume and the guy told me to see his lawyer. I went at 4 like he told me but it turns out that I had to wait till 5:30.  So I sat in the lobby. The lawyer leaving took pity on me and told me he could answer my questions for me. This lawyer was so hot (you should hear him trying to speak English. Ooooh) , but that doesn´t matter because he shattered any hopes of me going to hand in my papers for residency this weekend, which is the deadline to get this taken care of by the way. But he told me to come back later and discuss other possibilities. Like maybe I could wait for another 4-5 months and I may get somewhere or maybe I could get an job offer and apply at the Spanish embassy and come back. Who knows ? But if you want my realistic opinion I don´t think that the bar owner will send me back to the US to get a visa for a waitressing position on the beach.

Before then I went and talked to another guy and he told me that I could get my papers straightened out because he could give me a contract. Then he sent me to an office. The guy at the office told me that nothing could be done because I haven´t been registered here before August 8th and I don´t have any legal documents from the Spanish government proving that I was here before then.

I took my day off work, went to different places, walked around the city all day in bad shoes, waited a while in different places and all I got told was the same thing I have heard all along. NO.

I really am scared for myself. If this is how the rest of my life is gonna go I want someone to shoot me now. How long do things have to get fucked up for me ? On the way to the restaurant 2 days ago it rained and we got a flat tire on the way. Then we got there and the owner made me wait 2 hours only to tell me that he couldn´t help me. The day that I went to see him for the first time my coworker was trying to be funny and put a cup of coffee on my head to balance it. I didn´t know what it was and when I turned around the cup fell and coffee was spilled down my backside.

This week has been absolutely miserable. It is the most important for me and I have gotten nowhere. I am doing all the hard work with no results. And I don´t want to feel this way anymore. I need things to go right for once. I can take rejection up to a point.

David has done everything he can to help me but I am not gonna lie. I am getting fed up with him and I wish he would stop helping me because all of his suggestions were wrong, if not absurd. And I feel bad because he has gone out of his way to help me. Not one of his suggestions led to anything good. I have heard from 3 different lawyers. They all tell me the same thing, but David is convinced they are wrong. For him helping me I told him that if he ever comes to the US I will do everything I can to help him out. But I just wish that he would stop giving me suggestions that are either wrong or simply absurd.

I am going home by the end of next month. Perhaps I may even leave before this month is over because I can´t take this anymore. At least I know that I have exhausted all my possibilities.

I prayed last night and I left it up to God. I am so bad at praying but I told God that I don´t know what to do and that I am feeling confused. I told Him that I want Him to help me make a decision.

I guess that He did.

I really hope that some luck comes my way soon. But I will tell you one thing. Looking for a job back in California will be sooooooooooooo much easier. I now speak much better Spanish, I am a US Citizen and I know my rights (imagine that), I am not afraid of rejection like I used to be (after hearing NO for a whole year) AND I am also a college grad now. Not to mention that I am willing to relocate to other countries.

Anyways. I will update you all on what happens next.

Tuesday, May 3, 2005

31 Questions stolen from Jessie´s journal

31 Questions

1. WHAT'S 0N Y0UR MIND RIGHT N0W? Will I be able to stay here in Europe for another year or will I be going home next month?

2. WHAT ARE Y0U LISTENING T0 RIGHT N0W? My thoughts........ scary, huh?

3. C0MPLETE THE SENTENCE: THE W0RLD NEEDS...? More acceptance of each other

4. M0DEL 0F Y0UR CELL PH0NE? Ericsson R520m

5. WHAT WAS THE LAST THING Y0U ATE? An vanilla ice cream bar covered in coffee flavored chocolate.

6. IF Y0U WERE A CRAY0N, WHAT C0L0R W0ULD Y0U BE? Blue or yellow

7. WHAT D0 Y0U D0 DURING Y0UR CHILL TIMe? Read books, go online, go to the beach, watch Flaix TV


9. THE FIRST THING Y0U THINK AB0UT WHEN Y0U SEE THE 0PP0SITE SEX? His height and arms. No....really.

10. AUT0 0R MANUAL? Auto

11. FAV0RITE DAY 0F THE YEAR? Thanksgiving

12. FAV0RITE PLACE? The beach

13. FAV0RITE SP0RTS? Is bellydancing a sport?

14. D0 Y0U WEAR C0NTACTS? My eyes are too dry for that

15. SIBILINGS & THEIR AGES? Patrick 21

16. THE C0OLEST WAY Y0U HAVE T0 RELEASE PRESSURE? Writing on my blog and going out with my friends.

17. THINGS I HATE THE M0ST? Being lied to. Being told what to do. People talking behind my back.

18. WHAT'S THE BEST THINGS AB0UT BEING A GIRL/B0Y? I love having the freedom to dress up. Women have so many more choices: Makeup, high heels, skirts...............

19. SCARY 0R HAPPY M0VIES? Happy movies. The state of the real world scares me enough.

20. MY BEST FRIENDS Don´t really have any right now. But Christina and Shira back home in the US are the closest.

21. CH0C0LATES 0R FL0WERS? Both.

22. WHEN I'M STUCK IN A JAM... I get stressed

23. TEXT 0R CALL? It's all about texting here in Spain.

24. IF Y0U C0ULD TURN BACK TIME, Y0U W0ULD...  I would have registered in the city hall and in the US embassy when I got here. Then I wouldn´t be in this huge mess with getting papers.

25. IN Y0UR WALLET, Y0U HAVE? 5 Euros, my metro pass and my health card.

26. WHAT'S 0N Y0UR SCREEN SAVER? Don´t have one right now. 

27. FAV0RITE B0ARD GAME/S? Scrabble

28. FAV0RITE SMELLS? fresh clothes with softener, flowers................

29. WHAT IS THE LAST THING Y0U THINK 0F BEF0RE Y0U G0 T0 SLEEP? I wonder when I will be going back to California and if I will ever get EU residency for the next year.

30. THINGS I CAN'T LIVE WITH0UT: My cell, chapstick, internet..........

31. Y0UR FAV0RITE QU0TE?? Never give up.

This just doesn´t stop


So, yesterday I went to the restaurant where the owner said that he might give me a contract. When he interviewed me he seemed like a nice guy. Plus he said that he urgently needed another waitress.

I waited for about two hours for him to see us. Instead he sends a bitchy woman to tell us that there is nothing that they can do for us. She told us that they already have 2 waitresses and that they don´t need another which was a lie. The owner couldn´t   even tell me himself. So we catch the owner on the way out and he says that there is nothing that he can do. He said that he would be back in an hour to discuss it. We waited another hour. He didn´t come back. So I left.

David told me that he has an uncle that owns a restaurant that may be able to help me. He was convinced that his uncle could help me and he told me to meet him today after work. So I rushed around town to get ready to meet his uncle. When I called him, he told me that his uncle was unwilling to help and that there was nothing he could do.

I am going to hand in my resumes to 2 different restaurants tommorow that may be able to help me out. Of course I have to take time off work to do that.

I am tired. Tommorow is really my last chance.