Things really can get worse around here

Hello Everyone,

Well I woke up with three new prospects of getting my residency papers. And they were shot to hell. I didn´t think that it could get any worse. And I missed work. I may have to miss tommorow too, and my boss will probably be upset. I may get fired.  Deep deep down I kinda hope I will. But not really because I need the money badly.

I went to the first place and handed in my resume and the guy told me to see his lawyer. I went at 4 like he told me but it turns out that I had to wait till 5:30.  So I sat in the lobby. The lawyer leaving took pity on me and told me he could answer my questions for me. This lawyer was so hot (you should hear him trying to speak English. Ooooh) , but that doesn´t matter because he shattered any hopes of me going to hand in my papers for residency this weekend, which is the deadline to get this taken care of by the way. But he told me to come back later and discuss other possibilities. Like maybe I could wait for another 4-5 months and I may get somewhere or maybe I could get an job offer and apply at the Spanish embassy and come back. Who knows ? But if you want my realistic opinion I don´t think that the bar owner will send me back to the US to get a visa for a waitressing position on the beach.

Before then I went and talked to another guy and he told me that I could get my papers straightened out because he could give me a contract. Then he sent me to an office. The guy at the office told me that nothing could be done because I haven´t been registered here before August 8th and I don´t have any legal documents from the Spanish government proving that I was here before then.

I took my day off work, went to different places, walked around the city all day in bad shoes, waited a while in different places and all I got told was the same thing I have heard all along. NO.

I really am scared for myself. If this is how the rest of my life is gonna go I want someone to shoot me now. How long do things have to get fucked up for me ? On the way to the restaurant 2 days ago it rained and we got a flat tire on the way. Then we got there and the owner made me wait 2 hours only to tell me that he couldn´t help me. The day that I went to see him for the first time my coworker was trying to be funny and put a cup of coffee on my head to balance it. I didn´t know what it was and when I turned around the cup fell and coffee was spilled down my backside.

This week has been absolutely miserable. It is the most important for me and I have gotten nowhere. I am doing all the hard work with no results. And I don´t want to feel this way anymore. I need things to go right for once. I can take rejection up to a point.

David has done everything he can to help me but I am not gonna lie. I am getting fed up with him and I wish he would stop helping me because all of his suggestions were wrong, if not absurd. And I feel bad because he has gone out of his way to help me. Not one of his suggestions led to anything good. I have heard from 3 different lawyers. They all tell me the same thing, but David is convinced they are wrong. For him helping me I told him that if he ever comes to the US I will do everything I can to help him out. But I just wish that he would stop giving me suggestions that are either wrong or simply absurd.

I am going home by the end of next month. Perhaps I may even leave before this month is over because I can´t take this anymore. At least I know that I have exhausted all my possibilities.

I prayed last night and I left it up to God. I am so bad at praying but I told God that I don´t know what to do and that I am feeling confused. I told Him that I want Him to help me make a decision.

I guess that He did.

I really hope that some luck comes my way soon. But I will tell you one thing. Looking for a job back in California will be sooooooooooooo much easier. I now speak much better Spanish, I am a US Citizen and I know my rights (imagine that), I am not afraid of rejection like I used to be (after hearing NO for a whole year) AND I am also a college grad now. Not to mention that I am willing to relocate to other countries.

Anyways. I will update you all on what happens next.