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Sunday, August 26, 2012

Nasty Dog

Hello There My Little Chocolate Delights..............

So I am back............. I am a horrible updater and friend, but in my defense a lot has been going on. Ever since I got hired back in November, the commute has been horrific. It sucks massive donkey dong. I have also been looking for a new place. I just put down a deposit, but that is half the battle. The other half is the current tenant moving out and then me furnishing the place. I have never decorated anything. Also, I have never so much as even owned furniture, not even a TV. Never. It's about time I grow up a little and be the Queen of my castle for once. 

What else........................

So I have been housesitting for my friend while she's frolicking about in Europe. The agreement was to water her plants and take care of her dog. The dog........... what can I say ? She's such a sweetheart except that she's a little stinker.

So I've left my dirty clothes next to the hamper and she has been eating the crotch of my dirty underwear. I feel so violated. This morning I forgot to pick up my underwear after my shower. I go back, and nasty doggie dragged my knickers and left them chewed. I pointed my finger at her and called her a nasty little pervert, but she doesn't seem to give a fuck.

She also licks her asshole. On my bed. Usually she is busy licking her paws, but occasionally, while she is next to me, I will her some slurping. When I look over, I see her leg is up in the air, and she is swirling her tongue around her little chocolate starfish. Then she wants to put her face next to mine. 

If eating my undies and licking her bunghole aren't enough she has also taken to farting in my bed. It's pretty rancid. I've Dutch-ovened her before. But hot damn, she outranks me by far. 

The nasty combination of the above three is disgusting enough, but thankfully I don't have the desire to beat her, lol. I still carry her like a baby on her back and rub her belly.

Anywhoresies, enough for now. Besitos !

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

I thought eating your crotch out and licking of assholes were all a part of your beauty.

Red Shoes said...

Re: the dog licking her ass. Maybe she ate something that didn't taste good, so by licking her butt, she was trying to get the taste out of her mouth...

~shoes~

Riot Kitty said...

This is why cats are superior!

Big Mark 243 said...

I agree with the Traveler... I am thinking that comes with the admission to the ride..!

Good luck on furnishing your place... Target is great for starter apartments... and if you really want some nice pieces, got to the resale shops and garage sales...

Be well!

mac said...

What a lucky dog she is ;-)

Memphis said...

I couldn't deal with the underwear holocaust. I have two cats that wreak havoc on some of my things and I have ways of punishing them. Did you know that you can waterboard a cat? It's true. And they get the message pretty quick with that.

:-)

Reggie said...

Kill the dog and be done with it.

Jimmy's Journal said...

The dog may have eaten an attorney and it was just trying to get the taste out of it's mouth.

Funny post!

Jimmy