Weird

Hi Kittens,

So I just had a dream that I parked my car in a lot to watch an awful bellydancer. By the time I get out, I can't find my car. I keep looking for it, and it's nowhere to be found.

Eventually I find out that these guys working with heavy machinery on the building have their stuff in front of my car and won't move it for me to get out.

I beg and plead but the men keep taunting me, and one gives me a phone to call somebody because I am not getting my car out anytime soon. Him and his buddy get in my face too.

For the record, I called Ashleigh, lol.

Then I woke up.

I guess this is what I see in my head after watching Operation Repo late at night. Basically it's a reality show where people repo cars for a living and you get to catch peoples' reactions. The only problem with the show is that it is not even a reality show, but a "reenactment" of events using actors. So disappointed. But it makes sense. I mean, who on earth would consent to showing their face when getting their car repoed ? Also, the way the "actors" do a lot of things that are illegal if they were actually repossessing a car.

Anywho, I shared this little piece of info with you because you are my lovelies, and there are no secrets between us.

Now I must go and get my teeth cleaned !

Besitos ! Muah !

Love,

Senorita

I want to be your sincere friend with benefits....

Hola Fur balls,

I've been perusing the Craigslist ads again for entertainment. So many men are underlaid up there. There are so many ads out there where these men have something in common: They want someone to come out and play with their ding dongs. So these guys attempt to word their pleas differently in order to stand out.

One way is to ask for a friend with benefits, but say that he is sincere. So he wants a deep connection and sex with a woman, but he doens't want to put in the work and take her out and get to know her. He wants the relationship without the baggage, without the struggles.

Here you go my little loves, my "manslation" in bold...................


Title: "FWB" but more substantial and sincere than that Babe, I sincerely want to bang you with my substance.

Yes, what I'm essentially looking for is a friends with benefits relationship. But I'm looking for a connection in the purest sense. In the Biblical sense, baby. I wanna be like Moses and part your sea. I don't have the energy to immerse myself in the dating scene. I refuse to put any effort in a woman and when we go out, I will insist that we go Dutch. I'm also not the type of guy who'd walk into a bar and hit on every living, breathing thing. That's because I would have to buy them drinks first, and I don't want to spend the money. I find that obnoxious That's because even if I did step out of character and buy a drink, I still wouldn't get laid. So add all these factors, and you might understand why I chose to resort to craigslist. Because obviously Craigslist is the answer to your problems, lol.

I want the physical aspect but without the emotional baggage. I want to plow that field, but I don't want to go out there, and work for it. However, this doesn't mean I want to meet lifeless ragdoll that I can use and discard Using blowup dolls is getting kinda boring. I honestly want to meet someone who is more or less on the same page as I am. I want it to be mutual, fun, and uncumbered by anything. It won't be a cold, joyless act. Well not for me anyway, I will be too busy focusing on me, I will forget to ask you how you feel. Also, whenever you feel like it's not working out, feel free to tell me and I'll respectfully go about my own way. Sweet cheeks, I am only saying this, I will call you up and let you go after I feel things are getting a little close, and I will expect you to go away quietly. I can't stress enough that it won't turn out to be a big mistake. I can't stress enough that I am starting to sound desperate. If it doesn't pan out, we can leave and act as if nothing had happened. Because I obviously know how women think and operate.

I've put on my optimist/idealist cap and hope to find a lover who is searching for what I'm searching for. Actually, it's not my cap that is optimistic, it's my penis. Please send me a reply and we can talk. Like I said, you're never obliged to anything, and I won't ever force your hand because my hand has been forced enough every night. Let's work something out together as I am tired of working one out alone. I look forward to your message.

Blah Blah Blah...................

Hi Kitties,

This past weekend was the first full weekend I've had off in about two years. It was weird to wake up and not have to work on a Saturday. I used the afternoon on Saturday to practice our troupe routine for our dance performance. The troupe leader keeps changing the moves on us at the last minute, and I swear to God I have no idea how we are going to come together and make it work. But either way, I have my own performance after, so if I suck, I can make it up with my solo. Let's just hope the solo goes well.

On Saturday one of my friends came back from Russia and I went to her house to see pictures of her trip. She brought me back Russian chocolate, candies as well as other souvenirs. She knows that I am part Russian. But I wasn't really taught about my Russian side, as my Russian-Jewish immigrant great grandparents died a very long time ago. Plus, my grandfather wasn't in my life that much. We have a rich history. They were Jewish, and came over to Ellis Island during the pogroms, and I really feel that I missed out on learning about them. If the man of my dreams were Jewish I would definitely convert. I will try to visit Ellis Island soon. My friend also offered to let me come along with her and her family to Russia. Who knows what the future holds, but I hope a trip to Russia is part of it.

I also went to the Greek Festival with my friend from high school over the Labor Day weekend. It was a lot of fun. I bought a new red bellydance hip scarf. It can be worn as a hip scarf. Or sometimes old ladies like to drape it over their shoulders like a shawl.

My friend and I watched the dancing, looked at other overpriced stuff and ate Greek food. We ate Gyros, Loukamade (fried donut holes dipped in honey) all followed up by Greek coffee.

The dancers were interesting. Two teen boys dancing and picking up tables with their teeth. It wasn't really my style, but I give them props for doing that. My cousin married a Greek man, and at their wedding the groomsmen were all jumping in the air and doing kicks. I was hoping to see something like that.

Anyway my little furballs, I need to get ready to practice my dance moves.

Bussi !

P.S: It means " a kiss" in German you sick pervs, get your head out of the gutter. Especially you Porky !

Rude, Crude and Obnoxious........... (You've been warned)

Knock Knock ! Who's there ?

It's me ! Wondering why you're not naked !

Knock Knock ! It's me again !

STILL wondering why you're not naked...................


Hi Kitties !

The little gem I quoted from above is not a quote of mine, it belongs to my favorite internet comedian, Jon Lajoie. I saw him in person in February with my friend who introduced him to me. I was sick as a dog and under the influence of Nyquil but made it out. He was funny, and at the end of the show, he came out in that awful getup shown above and sang "Show Me Your Genitals". I was screaming like a little school girl.

I can also do the dance he is doing........

Holiday Weekend

Hi Little Loves................

Happy Labor Day weekend. I have Saturday and Sunday (today and tomorrow) off. It's been at least 2 years since that has happened. I got this off at the last minute due to our massive changes at my job. Four people got let go, and I was lucky to stay.

I will be working the morning on Labor Day. I will be waking up at the buttcrack of dawn to try and catch the train to my job.

I think I am going to hang out with some friends this weekend. One of my friends just got back from Russia so I would like to hear about her trip and see if she brought me back any souvies. Last time she gave me some Russian chocolate.

I practiced our dance routines for a couple of hours. I am dancing next Saturday at a bellydance festival. So if you kittens are in my area, don't hesitate to come on down and support me while I do the shimmy.

I will be dancing twice. Once with a troupe and once all by myself. The troupe changed the moves while I was away last weekend and now I have to start over and we only have a week left.

But I've been practicing my solo routine. I always get nervous for those.

I got a new bellydance skirt which I am happy about. I forgot how much more graceful I feel when wearing a skirt.

I usually wear pants when I dance because I usually dance with a sword on the floor. When I dance on the floor with a sword on my head two things can happen:

1.) People can accidentally get a money shot when you move your legs around. Accidental or not, it is especially vulgar in bellydance.
2.) You can get your skirt bunched up under you, causing you to lose balance. When that happens, the sword falls off, and the sword handle hits you upside the head. It hurts like a bitch. My sword is a scimitar which is kinda heavy.

Anywho, lunch is being served, and I need to eat.

Enjoy some bbq for me.

Besitos !