Saturday, January 29, 2011

The Senorita Seven

What's Up My Little Muffins ?

1.) It's my last weekend here at my place before I move out on Monday.

2.) I've gotten rid of so much stuff, and it's very therapeutic. I've been hanging on to stuff from the past way too long. Old letters from friends. Old birthday cards from people. I guess I felt a need to hold onto it because I am afraid of being alone. At least if I am alone now and in the future, I can look back and see that someone cared. But I've realized that you need to sometimes get rid of things to welcome new relationships and experiences in your life.

3.) Remember that douchelord I blogged about a couple of weeks back ? Well, he texted me yesterday, wondering if I wanted to "catch up". I told him I was too busy moving. He can go catch up with his penis for all I care.

4.) I am currently reading "The Power of Now" by Ekhart Tolle. Expect a book review soon.

5.) I just ate Chef Boyardee raviolis, and it's been so long since I've done that. It was delish !

6.) It turns out that I am not the only one moving in my building. I ran into a guy I would have random conversations with that lives three floors below me. I hadn't seen him in months, but we ran into each other in the elevator while we were both hauling our respective shit. He's moving out because he got a new puppy and I'm moving because my roommate is getting married. It's so interesting how life changes so fast. I was in such a different place when I moved in last year.

7.) This year has certainly gotten off to an interesting start. Last year I ventured out of my comfort zone and a lot happened for me. I got hired, I traveled, I made new friends.

However, this year is the year I am dealing with all of the emotional issues I've tried to ignore for years. I decided that I was going to a lot of self-reflecting and deal with the past, and it hopefully get it right this time. And once you open that can, it can whoop your ass.

8.) BONUS: I wish I could write about these issues and my childhood and just how not normal of a childhood I had. Maybe one day.

Sunday, January 23, 2011

Sex Tips

So What's Up My Little Love Muffins ?

So I told you that this year I would give reviews on things. Last blog post I reviewed a tarot card reading. I mean, in the grand scheme of things, who really cares about a card reading when I could be talking about sex moves ?

Who wants to know about reading cards when you could learn about sex?

Need some help in the sack ?

Senorita's got your back !

Two people with expertise here. The first guy was kind of experimenting here, but the second guy traveled all the way to India and knows all of the right moves.

What if you want to spice things up and add another partner ? No problem !

Namaste !

Friday, January 21, 2011

It may come true, or you may just your ass kicked.

What's Up My Little Bananna Splits ?

So I've been spacing in and out of blogland, but I am back. Or at least for now. Thank you for all your well wishes ! It means a lot that you care.

So here in my blog, I write about whatever the hell I feel like. Sometimes it's funny, sometimes it's serious. This year I would like to do more reviews on things, like books, products, experiences.......

So here goes.........

Today I will be reviewing Tarot Card Readings. I do get flamed by some for getting them,. but whatever. I don't just randomly chose the reader. I get referrals from people I trust and that is how I make my decision.

I've seen the same person for the past few years. I trust the person who referred me, and the reader did a great read for the person who referred me. I got my first reading from her in 2007, and she got me through a really difficult time and most of the things she said came true.

So last year in January (2010)I got another reading. One of the things she kept mentioning was that there would be a new man in my life that year. Maybe not the first guy I drew in, but definitely the man I would spend the rest of my life with. She described him as olive-skinned, he was a writer for his job but did something else as his career, had a heart of gold, looooved to travel........

So the first half of the year passed and I met no men whatsoever. I did meet someone during the summer, but he lived too far away. I met another guy on Halloween, and we saw eachother for a couple of months, but I eventually broke it off  in December because I was not really into him. It was hard to do, but I did it.

Once I resigned myself to the fact that 2010 would be another year passing me by with no one special and felt confident about the next year, I got an e-mail from a guy from a travel website that I am a part of.

This guy just moved to my area and wanted to know if I would like to meet up with him to learn how to play shuffleboard or go salsa/merengue dancing. I looked at his profile and loved reading about all of the things he had done. Then he added me on Facebook, and I saw all of his travel pictures and read about his
 adventures.

I really loved his pictures and his profile and he was handsome. Not the stereotypical handsome, but my specific type of handsome. This guy traveled all over the world, and did things I would only dream about. He was into volunteering, he had wonderful references on his travel site from people about what an excellent host he was, he seemed to have an upbeat personality. He was also a writer, but has a law degree and recently stopped practicing. On paper he was everything I was looking for.

Then it clicked.

That must be the guy ! So I figured, I would give him a chance. I haven't met any men I've been remotely attracted to in a few years anyway and I was really attracted to this guy and felt we had a lot in common.

He contacted me in the middle of December and in the beginning he seemed eager to meet, was polite. I gave him my number and told him to call me.

He never called me. And I wasn't going to call him either.

We did meet up, about a month after he first wrote me, but he never called but he would message me and say that he was busy but would keep in touch, and that he was excited to see me and looked forward to getting to know me in the new year.

 We finally met a week and a half ago. He contacted me through Facebook and he invited me to have drinks at a bar. Originally he was excited about teaching me how to play shuffleboard and going dancing ( love going dancing) but when we met, he just wanted to drink.

He invited me to one of the cheapest bars in town. I read the reviews, and they had the nastiest bathroom in town, apparently. I decided to just go with the flow and have a drink. While we were talking, he would ask me questions like: Why do you have a gap in your tooth ? Why do you blink your eyes a lot ? And when I told him why, he didn't believe me and questioned me further. He was very polite about how he asked me, so I didn't mind it so much ( I am not to self conscious about those things anyway), but still...... awkward !

He was also about 20-30 minutes late. I texted him what time I would be there and he still was late.

After I told him I didn't really like to drink, we went to the hookah lounge, but he complained about not having enough money and told me to chose the cheaper option.

He was agressive in making moves on me. When I pulled away he started asking what it was about ?

Basically, this guy was a total jerk, and the date ended in the most awkward way ever.

So yeah, I got my ass kicked.

But would I get another reading from that woman ? Yes.

She gave me information, the information I was meant to know. That man was a total dillhole, but he was a man I very much needed to meet. I can't really explain it without getting into details I don't really want to discuss, but I will tell you this..... While I was upset, and although I hope I never run into him again, I am so glad I met him. And I am glad it's over.

He acted as a mirror I needed. After that "date" (it really wasn't) I suddenly realized all of the dating mistakes I've been making and it all became so clear to me how to deal with the next one. And I am glad I learned my lesson on someone that was never serious to begin with. And c'mon, he had the same name as my ex, so that should have been a clue.

When I was looking through all of his travel pictures before we met, he reawakened my passion to get out and travel to other countries besides the ones in Europe, to go see the world, to live life in the moment. And even though he was definitely not dating material for me, at least I knew that there were still men in the world that I am attracted to. That men that I am looking for do exist. It is so frustrating to go out in the world and not feel any attraction out there. For the past four years, I feel like I've been living in a bubble. So at least, I know that there are dudes out there I am attracted to.

So while he is out of the picture, my desire to be more adventurous and give love another try isn't.

I firmly believe that if you are looking for information, you will get information, and it may not be what you are looking for. But it doesn't mean it isn't useful.

Also, truthfully, if I am going to meet someone special, I wouldn't want to know when anyway. And I really think that the man above or "the universe" or whatever verbiage you want to insert, knows that. I don't want to know. I want it to be a surprise.

So that is my review. Take it for what it's worth.

Wednesday, January 19, 2011

Why admit something like that ?

What's Up Buttercups ?

Let me just say that I hope I do not ever have a repeat of today. I am on new medication and holy crap. I blanked out in the shower. I saw white clouds, stars and my head started ringing like mad. I could not see or hear anything else. For a second I thought that I was having a Come To Jesus moment and that I was gonna meet my maker. And if I wasn't, I sure wished I did for about 30 seconds. Holy fucking shitballs ! I felt better for the rest of the day, but not because of the medication, but because anything else was better than that white cloud of hell. I was just thrilled to go about my day without any more incidents.

But I gotta give props to my dad. I called him because the doctor disconnected the phone, and my dad got me through it. He even offered to come and pick me up. I really have been feeling alone in this whole ordeal, and it was nice to know that my dad would have taken the four hour drive to take care of me. I wanted to call off work, but I didn't because I still have to make a living. I am glad I stuck it out. I had a decent day at work and kept busy.

But that is not why I am writing this blog entry.

I am writing because on the way home, they had a segment on the Latin radio station in Spanish and English about confessing. So basically, you call up and tell the world what bad habits you have, or show your closet skeletons. I was expecting someone to talk about their freaky sexual exploits. Or how they had sex on their boss's desk.

But some woman comes on the air and says that she only dates married men and doesn't like single men. She doesn't even sound remorseful. She's loud and proud and her reason for doing that is because she doesn't want the responsibility of cooking, cleaning and ironing for him. Hell, neither do I, but damn ! At least the men I've dated don't require me to do that. I didn't in my last relationship.

I am a woman so I know that the fastest way to getting judged and disowned by your own kind is to mention something like that. She must hate other women.

She got her ass chewed out of course by another female caller, she got called a homewrecker, una                "cualquiera" aka whore. The male announcer asked her if she felt bad, if she was breaking up a family, or taking another woman's man. She didn't feel bad because she said it was the man's decision to be with her.

How do I feel about it ?

I feel it's wrong, but the reason I decide not to be with married men is out of self-respect, not because I am thinking of other women or families. Other people do not factor into my equation. I feel that if I were with an attached man like that, I wouldn't be getting what I deserve which is someone all to myself, a healthy relationship, something we all deserve.

I also wouldn't hang out with a woman like her. I would just avoid her like the plague and so would my friends, even though they have wonderful husbands. Even though you may trust your husband, I still think it's completely foolish to stop occasionally keeping an eye on things. And lets face it, it gets tiresome having to have to constantly keep watching your back.

In my legal classes, my teacher always told us women to keep an eye on things, to be involved in the finances, to see where the money is going. Not necessarily tracking every penny, but knowing what is going on. My grandmothers have been loving women to my grandpas, yet remained involved in the finances. And when my Opa in Austria passed away, my Oma knew how to take care of herself. And when another man came along and tried to take advantage, she threw his ass out on the street.

Anyway, but the woman in question does have a point. The husbands she sleeps with made the decision to break their vows. As much as people want to hate her, she still owes nothing to the wife or children. It's the unfaithful husband that owes his wife and kids. The woman, although she should know better bears no responsibility to the wife and kids.

The way I see it, if a man is going to cheat, he will cheat.

Anywhooters, this post has gotten longer than I originally intended, so I am going to log off and take my meds.

Besitos !

Monday, January 17, 2011

Snaked From Shoesies ......................

1. if you have pets, do you see them as merely animals, or are they members of your family?


Members of my family, of course !


2. if you can have a dream to come true, what would it be?

True love

3. what is the one thing most hated by you?

Deception, bring lied to


4. what would you do with a billion dollars?

-Change my phone number
-Quit my job
-Travel the world
-Hire an excellent tax attorney and a lawyer
-Help my family members
-Run a charity so I can manage where the funds go myself


5. what helps to pull you out of a bad mood?

Usually bellydance, but if that doesn't work I just call it a day and hope the next day is better.


6. which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?

Both are equally important in my book. There is no point if it's not being returned.


7. what is your bedtime routine?

I always brush my teeth and remove my makeup.


8. if you are currently in a relationship, how did you meet your partner?

Currently single and bilingual.........



9. if you could watch a creative person in the act of the creative process, who would it be?

Myself, I always enjoy making up a dance routine and seeing it through, I love blogging and getting comments...........


10. what kinds of books do you read?

Currently I am reading The Power of Now, and I have mixed reviews on it......


11. how would you see yourself in ten years time?

Seriously ? I can't even predict tomorrow, so asking me this question is just outrageous.


12. what’s your fear?

Living the same lifestyle that I do forever........


13. would you give up all junk food for the rest of your life for the opportunity to visit outer space?

Fuck no, for a thrill I would rather skydive ! There, I found my loophole.


14. would you rather be single and rich or married, but poor?
It all depends.....

If the marraige is a good one, I would rather be married and poor. But thank God, I don't have to choose.......


15. what’s the first thing you do when you wake up?

After opening my eyes, I turn off the alarm clock......


16. if you could change one thing about your spouse/partner what would it be?

Well hopefully I wouldn't have to want to change anything about who I love.............



17. if you could pick a new name for yourself, what would it be?

I am fine with what I've got....... And I love my last name......


18. have you ever been betrayed by a family member to the point it broke your heart? What did you do to get through it and go on with life? What made it better? would you forgive and forget no matter how horrible a thing that special someone has done?

Oh totally, by my mother...... Got over the heartbreak a long time ago, I've accepted the circumstances and maintain as little communication as possible. I have forgiven her, but I would be a fool to forget. What makes it better, is that she has little interest in communicating with me too, so it works out.


19. if you could only eat one thing for the next 6 months, what would it be?
Buttercream frosted cupcakes.......

Monday, January 10, 2011

Give the man some privacy for the love of Jesus ................

So What's Up My Little Wieners ?

So if you male readers out there had problems in the sack and needed assistance, where you would you go to rectify that ?

Would you go to Walgreens ?

Because some poor schmuck did, and I stood right next to him in line today.

So here's how it went down................

I was returning perfume before my bellydance class. Was in line minding my own business, not giving a flying fuck about my surroundings. Some guy stands right behind him and I give him the "I was in line first, bitch" glare.

So while I am returning my stuff, the guy puts his stuff down next to me and I STILL didn't notice.......

UNTIL the older Phillipina clerks started talking about how to do a return or exchange or a rebate or whatever on the Extenze and Libido. And they kept mentioning "Extenze" and "Libido" a few more times.

I was like......Omg..... wtf ???

So I look over, and within a couple of minutes I get to learn that he has a small penis and and has a libido problem. And not because he showed me or said anything, but the products were staring at me and I couldn't look away.

My back was to him, so he couldn't see the smirk on my face. I am proud of myself, that I kept my shit together.

I know we all have problems, and I am not really laughing at that man's problems.

It's that fact that he boldly walked into Walgreens and didn't even seem that embarrassed. Or maybe he thought I didn't notice as we were the only two people in line. I think he was doing an exchange or something. It was like he was buying eggs or milk.

First of all, if I were to buy something personal like that, I would do it online. Or even if I were brazen enough to buy it in a store, if I bought the wrong thing, I would suck it up and cut my losses, because we all know how long and hard (and not in a good way) returns at Walgreens could be.

I also think they could've been more sensitive to his situation.

So anywhore, that was my day in a nutshell.

How was yours ?

Besitos !

Sunday, January 9, 2011

Senorita's Seven

So What's Up My Little Biscuits ?

How was your weekend ? Mine was decent, although I wish there was more excitement. I worked and stayed in all day today. I didn't feel like going our or anything like that. I really needed a day off all to myself. I finally got it, alone, all to myself.

Anywhooters......... Here is the Senorita Seven. Basically, I don't feel like writing in paragraphs, so I will just give it to you in a list.

Here goes...............

1.) I am eating the chocolates my Swedish host gave me last weekend. So delicious ! They are called Droste, and they are Dutch and not Swedish, but who cares ? Soooooo good.....

2. ) I am watching the newest Bachelor with Brad Womack. Wow, Brad is friggin' HAWT ! I am normally not into blondes (Senorita likes her some olive skin) but he is smokin'.

So I hear that he rejected two women from the past seasons and he's getting a lot of heat for it. I think one of the women slapped him. I didn't watch that season, so I can't say for sure.  I think that the heat he got was a little unfair. I think he did those ladies a favor by sending them home if he couldn't commit. If you don't feel it, you don't feel it and the sooner you cut the ties, the kinder you are being. I understand that the women felt they were being led on, but in romance aren't we all at some point so we can figure out if we are making the right decision or not ?

Do I think he is kind of a commitment phobe and has issues ? Maybe, and that is his problem, but can you honestly expect to find love and have it last on a TV show ? No, so I applaud him for owning up to his feelings.

All is fair and love and war. I truly believe that. Feelings will get hurt at some point, even though most of us start out with good intentions.

3.) I am moving by the end of the month and found a new place. I put down the deposit and got the key. Let the moving begin. Now I need to find some muscles to help me move.

4.) I am dancing in a troupe again this year at Rakassah (biggest bellydance festival in the world) and I got us a spot after spending all day on the phone. I haven't danced in a troupe since 2006, so I am nervous dancing with a big group of girls again. I've danced alone for so long. We shall see how things go. I am looking forward to getting a new costume.

5.) I am seriously thinking about galivanting around Europe this summer. I would like to travel to other places in the world like Latin America and the Middle East, but at this point it is difficult to find others to travel with me, so I really only feel comfortable traveling alone to Europe.

6.) I got my passport picture taken, and I look like a pimp smacked me up. My eyes are tired, my hair is hiding my tank top so it looks like I am not wearing any clothes, and I just look more Eastern European than I ever have before. I mean, I know my heritage is mainly Eastern European, but damn, it came out in that picture. I am scared to get that passport back.

7.) I really wonder what 2011 holds for me this year. If you had to make any predictions for me, what would you say ?

So that is all for now, loves.

Love, hugs, kisses and shimmies !

-Senorita

Tuesday, January 4, 2011

Couchsurfing Hostess Extraordinaire !

Hello My Little Chocolate Chip Cookies !

What's up ?

So this weekend I hosted my first Couchsurfer. He was from Sweden, and he stayed with me for two nights. I have always wondered what it would be like to host a complete stranger, and now I know ! Prior to this, I was hosted in Paris by three different people.

My guest wanted to stay with me because I live very close to the Sharks Stadium and he wanted to watch the hockey game. What I didn't realize was that he was coming not to cheer for our San Jose Sharks, rather the opposing team, Vancouver, because they have Swedish players. I thought it was hilarious to imagine him sitting all by himself cheering for the opposing team amongst the Sharks fans in their Jerseys. I told him to curb his enthusiasm so he wouldn't get beaten to a bloody pulp.

Anyway, on Sunday he arrived and we drove up to San Francisco. We drove to Lombard Street and took pictures, walked down to In and Out Burger and had lunch. I had to introduce him to a proper American hamburger, none of that McDonalds shit that you can get even in Sweden. While we were enjoying our burgers, I noticed that Hooters was right across from us. I told him that he would love Hooters. We were sitting next to a family with children, but that didn't deter me from explaining to him why Hooters was famous and why he would enjoy it.

So yeah, he was more than willing to go to Hooters and he got a good look at our waitress. He also got a picture with her, and he was very pleased with the view. We had chocolate cake while he got to stare at the boobies galore.

After that we walked around Pier 39 and then we took a cable car back up to Lombard Street and drove his car back down. I stuck my head out like a dog while he did all the turns. Then we proceeded to go to the Golden Gate Bridge. It was waaaaaaay too cold to walk across, but we did take pictures. We also drove through Haight-Ashbury. I've been to SF many times, but I had never been through the Haight. That was interesting. I will have to go back.

                                                                        Lombard Street

Danger lurks........

Hans from Sweden.......

I'm hungry......

The weather sucked huge whale ass, but at least it didn't rain on us while we were there.....

Twin peaks......

So yeah, that was my weekend in a nutshell. It's always interesting to see your city from a tourist's point of view. I was amused each time he whipped out his camera to take pictures of the cable cars or things on the streets, or when he pointed the camera at me.

It was also nice to finally practice my German.

Also it was interesting talking to him in English because it reminded me of my relatives in Austria and the way they express themselves. It's very systematic, very logical.

Some of my favorite quotes of his..........

"We don't need to worry about parking. I am a lucky Swede."

"I like Taco Bell, Mexican Food and Hooters"

"You just took pictures of me with those birds" ( He meant the chicks at Hooters)

Anywhooters, that is all for now. I briefly relinquished my passport because I am renewing it and getting a new one. When that one comes in the mail, I look forward to breaking it in and doing some more globetrotting myself.

But before I do that I hope that 2011 can be the year that I meet some of my fellow bloggers in person.

Besitos !

 

Sunday, January 2, 2011

New Years

Hello There My Little Fluffy Kittens !

Happy New Year !

Wow, where do I begin ? My New Years Eve was interesting to say the least. Last year on New Years a guy at work fell off a ladder when I arrived.

This year, we had a fire on my street. I heard people screaming and running into the street, and the apartment across from mine was on fire. Smoke was just pouring out. Luckily I didn't see any flames and thank GOD the fire department arrived on time. WOW. I was scared shitless for a moment. I am so thankful the fire department had everything under control. They totally rocked ! And to think our government is scaling back on their services.........

After that fiasco, I met at Heidi's house and we were on our way to a nice dinner in the hills at a restaurant called The Grand View. And what a grand view it was. But before we got there, her transmission went out and we had to push the car. I was in heels, and the other guy with us was 79 and had a bad knee. What a hot mess. Luckily we didn't have to push that hard, and luckily we had a couple of big strong cowboys to come outside and help us. Dinner was lovely, we had a wonderful view, and I ate a LOT.

After that, we went to Santana Row to a trendy bar called the Blow Fish. They were gonna charge us $20 each to get in, but they ended up letting us in for free. I was there to meet an old friend of mine and his buddies. We didn't see him for a while, so we just went off to the corner and danced. We put our purse and jacket down next to us in a little corner and just danced. Now I haven't danced at a club like that in about 7 years so it was a lot of fun.

I should mention that while we were at this trendy club from start to finish, we had a creepy lurker/stalker guy follow us. I don't know what his deal was but when he saw us he decided to latch on and not let go. He asked us if he could join the party with us while we were in line and we just looked at him and ignored him. After we got in for free, somehow he got his creepy ass in too and found us dancing on the floor. He just danced next to us for the ENTIRE time, which was about an hour. It was creepy, because I was wearing a dress that bared my shoulders and his cold and clammy hand would kinda graze across it "accidentally" while we were dancing.

But you know what ? That guy didn't steal my joy because I was so into dancing with Heidi and bringing in the New Year that I didn't give a flying creepy fuck about what Mr. Creepy McCreeperson was gonna do. And it was fabulous. That hour of dancing with Heidi was the highlight of the evening and a great way to bring in 2011.

Then I went to meet up with my old friend and his crew. Wow, they were good looking and waaay better then the crowd at where we were dancing. They asked me to stay and drink, but I didn't feel like it and I wanted to lose Mr. Creeperson so we politely declined and left.

Then Heidi and I went back to her place and had a huge pillow fight and made out. Hahaha..... no we didn't. We just lit a candle and talked about the new year and our hopes and dreams.

Anywhooters, that was my new years eve in a nutshell. Yesterday Heidi and a couple of our friends had a nice dinner.

So that's all for now. Got's to go.

Besitos !