Hello There My Little Desserts,
So lately I have been taking a Make Senorita Cry Like A Little Bitch class. It involves kickboxing and abs. We'll see how long I last. Basically my little chocolate eclairs, the class consists mainly of chicks, and once in a while we get a man or two, other than the male instructor.
I don't know why there aren't any more men in the class, as we do some martial arts. I think, what it is, is that because we're mainly women that they think that it's easy and that the class is for pussies.
Anyway we had a new guy try out the class on Monday. A guy who is older, has a bad combover, and a gut. You'll see why this is relevant later.
The instructor loves to torture us with ab work, and most of it involves us women putting our legs in the air and spread apart like we're going to the freaking gynegologist. You know, the splits in the air, and reaching up to touch each toe.
He also has us open our legs and swirl them around in circles and the same time. And then go in the opposite direction. What was funny about it was not that us ladies were exposing our hoohas, but that Mr. Middle Aged Balding Gut guy was the only one whining and moaning like he was giving birth. All of us ladies were sucking it up and doing it, but Mr. Combover sounded like he was birthing Moby Dick. I thought that was bad, but after about 30 seconds, he then graduated from moaning to sounding like a woman having sex. I kid you not. That was aaaaawwkward !!!!!
The teacher wasn't done torturing us then either. At the end of the class he had us do the Dying Turtle. Which was worse than the previous exercises. If you want to know what The Dying Turtle is, lie on your back, lift up your back at a 45 degree angle and spread out your arms, and then lift up and spread your legs in the air, and slowly lower them until you feel your abs burn. It was bad enough that we were all reliving the gynecologist experience. What was worse was the instructor coming by and opening our legs more and lowering them to feel the burn. What was even worse was Mr. Middle Aged Bald Guy with his legs in the air crying like a whale was about to slide out of his vagina.
I get that I may go to Hell for laughing at that man, but I couldn't help myself. I fully support people getting back into shape, but damn ! You can shut your piehole in the process. I didn't laugh out loud, but it definitely made doing my exercises harder.
That is all for now. Please pray for me and ask Jesus to forgive me for my sins.
Muchas Gracias !