Good Morning My Little Dumplings !
So yesterday I pulled a little survey out of my ass and thanks to those of you for answering or commenting. My dad even filled it out and sent it back. Clearly the apple does not fall far from the tree.
Anyhoochie, my answers are below.
1.) WHAT ARE YOU WEARING ? Who cares ! Underneath my clothes, I am not wearing anything. And guess what ? I am naked underneath my clothes every single day.
2.) WHAT IS ONE THING THAT PEOPLE SAY ABOUT YOU THE MOST ? "You are a character" or "You have beautiful eyes"
3.) WHAT IS ONE THING YOU WILL NEVER HEAR SOMEONE SAY ABOUT YOU ?
"My, look how tall you are !"
4.) WHAT PERFUME OR COLOGNE DO YOU WEAR ? Parisienne by YSL
5.) VANILLA OR CHOCOLATE ? Vanilla AND chocolate
6.) PLAYBOY OR MAXIM ? I don't read either, but Maxim is more interesting.
7.) WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU SPOKE WITH ON THE PHONE ? Heidi
8.) WHAT DO YOU HAVE FOR A RINGTONE ? A lebanese pop song
9.) WHAT COUNTRY DO YOU WANT TO TRAVEL TO MOST ? France, at least for now. I always change my mind.
10.) IF YOU ARE A MAN... ARE YOU A LEG MAN OR AN ASS MAN ? Not a man but I would probably be an ass man.
11.) IF YOU ARE A WOMAN, WHAT IS THAT ONE THING ABOUT A GUY'S APPEARANCE THAT IS A DEALBREAKER ?
If he is shorter than me. I am only 5 ft tall.
12.) DO YOU BELIEVE IN GOING DUTCH ON A FIRST DATE ? Hells to the fucking no ! If a man insisted going Dutch with me, yeah I would graciously pay my half, but I wouldn't return his calls anymore.
13.) WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOUR DATE FROM THE INTERNET SHOWED UP AND LOOKED 10 YEARS OLDER AND AT LEAST 30 LBS HEAVIER THAN IN THE PICTURE ?
A lie is a lie is a lie so there are no second chances for that. If he can blatanly lie about something so obvious such as looks, think about what he's not telling you. He could be married or have a gambling problem for all I know.
So I would sit and have lunch with him and pretend that I don't notice that he's built like a fucking mac truck. But I wouldn't return his calls after that, that's for sure. I may also offer to pay my half so he is clear that I don't want anything from him.
14.) MEN.... WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOU WOKE UP AND DISCOVERED YOU HAVE A WOMAN'S BODY ?
I have a woman's body. It's awesome !
15.) LADIES, WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF YOU WORK UP AND DISCOVERED THAT YOU ARE TRAPPED IN A MAN'S BODY ?
Jump up and down in front of a mirror or pretend my penis is talking in funny voices.