Saturday, April 29, 2006

Hello there my lovelies,

I gotta say that I absolutely love the sunny weather. It's wonderful to see the sun out with no big, grey clouds looming over.

I have written entries before about the guy that I have been seeing. For the sake of this journal I'll just call him Chad. We aren't seeing each other anymore.

He is going through a rough time and needs to take care of his issues so I let him go so to speak. I was tired of calling him and getting his voicemail. I was tired of him not returning my calls, so I finally confronted him and told him how I felt and told him he should have his space. In a nutshell he also agreed and we ended this on the phone.

I really did like the guy and I still do. Though my friends tell me they think he's really married and he's hiding something from me, I know he's not married. And if he's hiding something, it's really no longer my concern anymore.

I miss him, but I am happy with the way things turned out. He told me that he wanted to get through his shit first and then come back to me. He said a lot of nice things about me and told me that he thinks I am special and that he wants a chance with me after he takes care of what he needs to do.

Do I really believe that he's hiding anything ? No. Do I believe that he's gonna come back to see me ? I really can't say. It would be so naive of me to fully believe it. I would still like to see him, but I am not waiting by the phone.

I am not out there looking for another guy. I am trying to get my life together. I am going through a lot of changes right now and need to focus on myself. I am overwhelmed as it is. I didn't even have time for a guy when I was dating him.

On the other hand I am not just gonna sit there and wait for him to come back. I remember how awful I felt when I called his cell over and over and only got his voicemail.

Anyways, I'm sure I'll find out sooner or later.


No comments: