Saturday, March 20, 2010

Why I Need Jesus

Hello My Little Fuzzy Ducklings,

So......... my roommate bought Girl Scout cookies. Not just any Girl Scout cookies. He brought home Thin Mints. I honestly couldn't care less about the Samoas nor do I care for Tagalongs. Those are still sitting unopened in the freezer. But the Thin Mints are a totally different situation.

The Thin Mints are my crack. You know how drug addicts want for nothing more than to lock themselves in the house, and shoot themselves up until they die ? Well, when I get my hands on Thin Mints, I just want to go into my room, and wolf down the entire package. I have finished off an entire box before. I didn't do that this year, but OMG I totally fantasized about it.  Especially since they were in the freezer and oh so nice and cold. If I didn't care about my figure or boys, I would totally be wolfing them all down right now. Did you know I still have some crumbs in my bed ? I have no shame. Reminds me of the times Ashleigh and I would make cake batter and eat the entire bowl followed by frosting. God I miss that girl, we're supposed to get together again soon.

Did you also know that I love Bret Michaels ? That man is a total rockstar/dirty manwhore/walking STD on legs that will bang anything with tits, but I can't help it but love him and his antics on TV. I started watching Celebrity Apprentice because of him, and you know what ? His team won and he raised money for his charity, which was for The American Diabetes Association. I hear he gets kicked off fairly early, but whatevs. I enjoyed the fact that the women picked him as a group leader thinking he would lose because they felt like "what does a manwhore know about business." But he still kicked those bitches asses running on one hour of sleep and battling diabetic attacks. So priceless.

I just can't wait until he comes back for the 4th Season of Rock Of Love. I hear they are in production right now. I really hope that is true.

So yes, I need some Jesus right about now so I get back to healthier eating and picking better role models. If I were Catholic I would confess. Speaking of which, sometimes I wonder about those priests listening to confessions. They get no action (at least officially) so I imagine they would live vicariously through the sinners in the church. I am sure some of them are feeling titillated as they listen to people confessing about all the lusty activities they've been partaking in.

So that is all for now my fuzzy little quackers.

Besitos !

17 comments:

mac said...

It's the Dosidos that I can't give up. Those peanut butter sandwiches are just too good to put down!!!

I believe the Girl Scouts have some kind of evil World domination plan. It's all tied in with the cookies and their addictiveness somehow....

As to eating too much,
I don't care about boys. Your figure, however, does interest me ;-)

Secretia said...

This year I'm not eating any Girl Scout cookies, last year I ate a box and a half at one sitting, then an hour later I ate the other half-box.
Right on to my fat ass they went!

Secretia

Kerrie said...

Confession is not all it's cracked up to be. I would stick to the thin mints if I were you. Not that I go these days I am to busy eating French Fancies ( they are my crack).
Girl scouts don't sell anything here,or not that I am aware of. I think they just hang out im tents scoffing the thin mints themselves.

FierySaggGirl said...

I wish I would have read your post five minutes ago Ms.Señorita BEFORE I indulged in a pity party and polished off the remaining Samoas! Off to the treadmill I go.

LYN said...

LOVE THE NEW PICS OF YOU ON YOUR PAGE..YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL!!

BRET WAS THE MYSTERY TASTER ON RACHAEL RAY THIS WEEK..HE IS SEXY I WILL GIVE YOU THAT!!

Winivere said...

Looks as if you are getting more comfortable with your journal. Great pictures and posts! Sorry have not been around lately. Too tired to write, working the long hours, but this week I got two days off. Hope I find another job before this job runs out.

Winivere said...

PS... I don't think you have that much to confess or do you? If so, you haven't written about it! Ha!

Ily said...

I agree with you about the priests. They always say, "Go on..." like they're totally fantasizing during the confession (and what they really want to say is "Don't stop!"). lol

My husband's allergic to mint, so we don't even have mint toothpaste in the house...but I'm buying those cookies, dammit!! You make them sound awesome!

PS - I know what you mean about Bret Michaels...such a bad boy but oh so interesting to watch! I can't believe I missed the premier of that show...I'll catch the second one tonight!

Red Shoes said...

Thin mints... yum... and alcohol... LAFFS

~shoes~

Ms. Jenni [xo] said...

I wont lie, I think Brett Micheals is a total hottie. He's one of the few guys that can pull of eyeliner, without making me want to hork.

KrippledWarrior said...

DUH!

* Ashleigh * said...

Super excited to see you! :)

Just telling it like it is said...

Oh that Bret He wears a hair piece doesn't he?

Candice said...

Did you know that Walmart sells knockoff girlscout cookies? Well they do.

And their thin mint version tastes exactly like the GS kind, but half the price.

I know this because I'm a thin mint whore.

Don't judge me.

UBERMOUTH said...

I have no idea who the guy is you are talking about OR the biscuits.
God I am getting old.

UBERMOUTH said...

* I do love Darn Girl's comment though!!!

Red Shoes said...

I like Cheeses quite a bit... there's cheddar cheese... and swiss cheese... and Gouda cheese... oh... wait... you said JESUS!!!!!

My bad... Im sorry...

Never mind... :oD

~shoes~