Friday, September 4, 2009

Sleep in my bed and help me get better karma........(Long and hard post)

Hello There My Little Fuzzballs,

The economy sucks balls. People are laid off, losing their homes, just going through a tough time in general. (Ashleigh, not a word from you.......)

And because of that, there will always be some people who are willing to capitalize on your misfortune, yet cover it up as "doing you a favor."

Like our little gem below. I found him on Craigslist in the housing section. I've been perusing the room-for-rent ads to see what's out there as well as get an idea of what prices are reasonable.

Prizes like this dude have been on the rise. They may have a job or a place to live, yet they can't get laid. So what do they do ? Offer their room for a "reduced rent" situation or they offer it for free. All the woman has to do is share the bed, or cuddle or hang out. No sex required !

Anyhoochie, here is the ad of the day, with my glorious ponderings in bold:

I thought I'd try and get some good Karma coming my way and give someone a break on rent, and get some companionship for me along the way as well...I'm looking for a female to share my bed and be my cuddle partner...nothing sexual...just snuggling. Free to you, just buy your own food. I have no time nor the effort to find a girlfriend (not that I'm looking for a "girlfriend experience"), just miss the companionship and snuggling. Great apartment, great neighborhood, pool, jacuzzi, cable, wireless internet...all free to you.

1.) Someone needs to reach out to this poor bastard and explain that you can't bang your way into good karma. If that were the case a helluva lot more men would be on the path to righteousness.

2.) This prize expects the female to sleep in his bed, and just cuddle and expect that he won't accidentally touch a boob or trip and fall into her ?

3.) So he expects her to cuddle with him, sleep in the same bed, share the whole apartment, yet his food is off limits ?

4.) No time or effort to find a girlfriend ? And not that he's looking for the "girlfriend" experience. The man is flat out lying. He is desperate and just frustrated that no one is playing with his ding-dong. Trapping a woman in his apartment is his last hope. If he were telling the truth, he'd be too busy whoring around instead of writing a desperate ad in the housing section of Craigslist.

5.) Great apartment, great neighborhood, pool, jacuzzi, cable, wireless internet...all free to you. Remember, not all is free as he will expect you to buy your own food. Oh, he mentioned the jacuzzi, as you will probably try to pork you in it. Don't think I am joking, as earlier this year I caught two people getting loud and roudy in the jacuzzi of our apartment complex. Oh, and P.S: usually men who offer places like this for free have mediocre places at best. Usually they are in run down neighborhoods with unkempt lawns, rowdy children, and gawd-awful banda music.

While we are at it, I will admit that I learned this lesson the hard way. Not here of course, but overseas in Barcelona in a foreign country. I was on my own, and things weren't working out. My money was running out, I had no one to turn to, and if I didn't think fast I wouldn't know where I would sleep or live.

So I went to be an au-pair in San Sebastian to three boys. I even took the train to meet the family. A doctor, his wife and three boys. They seemed nice and they had a beautiful house. You could see France from our back yard. They had a pool, and the best food around.

Yet when I moved in, I felt so depressed. I could barely contain myself and do my duties of watching the three boys and cleaning the house. I felt trapped. I was basically isolated on a mountain, slept in a room in the basement area, and was way underpaid, as I had no working papers AND I was living in their house. They said I would be a part of their family, but I definitely didn't feel that way. I couldn't bond. The wife didn't want to talk to me. If I needed something, she told me to go ask her husband, and he didn't really want to deal with me either.

I lasted a week. I couldn't take it anymore, so I lied and said someone died back home. I then packed my shit up there and bolted.

Long story short, before I left I called my American friend who I met a few weeks prior. He kept telling me to come back to Barcelona. It would be okay. He would get me a job at his firm and he would let me stay in his spare bedroom. What did I need ? Did I need money ? He would give me money. Anything I needed he was willing to help me out.

Why ? Because "Americans help each other out"

At that point I was broke, had nothing, and needed the cash. Instead I took out an advance on my credit card and said no to his cash offer. I don't care how broke I am, I won't accept a wad of cash from a man unless he is family. I would let him buy me dinner, but I just can't bring myself to accept cold cash from a man I barely know.

I agreed to his place, as he lived there for free for his job. So he wasn't really going out of his way for me. I also asked him what he would expect out of me if I live with him.

He said that there were no strings attached. I made him swear up and down that he wouldn't come knocking on my door for "benefits". He promised me over and over that would never happen.

It was a risk, but a risk that I was willing to take since I was so miserable. I was ready to jump off a cliff if I didn't get out of that house in San Sebastian. So I took the train back to Barcelona, and didn't look back.

Anyway, he got me the job at his firm, and I was finally getting paid. As for his apartment, I lasted for three weeks before he started getting a little hostile with me. He never forced himself on me, but he picked on me in other ways. He kept getting meaner because I would go out, learn the language and meet people while he stayed inside and ordered take-out. He said real nasty things, and we fought so loud that the neighbor scolded him, lol.

So I quickly found another roommate, a man that spoke no English, and moved into his place. I took some food out of the my old roommate's fridge since I was hungry, and I got called up and told how selfish I was for taking food. But I was out, didn't care, and I ignored him at work.

Little did I know that I would later have drama with my new male roommate, but that is for another entry.

I know I go off on tangents, but I learned this lesson early. There is no such thing as something for free. There are always conditions attached to gestures.

I was lucky I was unharmed. Thank goodness, because when I called home to report this, I wasn't taken seriously. I asked for financial assistance and was basically told to suck it up and wait until I got paid. And I did, so I can look back and know that I can take care of myself.

This guy contacted me a couple of years later on the IM. I asked why he was so mean, and he said that he knew I wouldn't sleep with him and he was pissed about it. He was basically frustrated. He knew we had an agreement, and took it out on me in other ways.

I have forgiven him. Yeah, he was a jerk, but he got me back to Barcelona, and into a job. Because of that, I was able to stay in the country for another 8 months and enjoy the country. And for that I was and still am grateful.

Sometimes people that help you out in the beginning can turn on you. Sometimes what you think is a blessing in the beginning doesn't last. I guess some people are meant to come in your life and stay for a short period of time. My aunt experienced this in Spain as well, many years ago. She was attacked by one guy, and the guy who comforted her turned on her and tried to attack her later.

So I really went off tangent.

Ciao for now kittens................


Loving Annie said...

There always is an expected exchange of value in some way shape or form in any transaction - emotional, intellectual, physical, financial, etc.

The best exchanges are when things are equal, clearly and TRUTHFULLY/FACTUALLY stated up front.

You learned the hard way to be self-reliant, and the important thing is that now you have that capability of self-sufficiency and reiliency.

There ARE good people out there. You're screening through the waste-of-time's (liars) like the guy abovre and know a red flag when you see it.

Liam said...

Senorita there are never no strings attached when it comes to sharing a place with a man unless he is gay.

I don't view sex for money in the same way most people do. However I do not recommend anyone try it just because of hard times. It leaves a great psychological implant on your psyche. Yes even for men.

But if you are going to room with a man I can guarantee that sex is on his mind.

Last but not least the guy who placed the add who just wants to cuddle is so obvious he should be slapped silly. I find it is best just to come out and say what you mean. He would probably have better luck that way.

Courtney said...

Female roommates.......

Tee aka The Diva's Thoughts said...

That's quite a story. I am really glad you were safe because no telling what could have happened.

Paul Nichols said...

So apparently females don't have apartments to share/rent? Interesting.

Angela said...

Aber aber, liebe Sandra, Dein Gedaechtnis hat aber schon gelitten...ich erinnere mich an die vielen Anrufe und dass ich Dich flehentlich gebeten habe, auszuziehen und die Polizei anrufen, und ausserdem haben wir dir Geld geschickt - nicht einen Haufen, aber genug um Dir da aus der Situation rauszubringen.
Bitter vergiss solche Sachen nicht.
Ich erwarte mir ja keinen Dank, aber bitte erinnere dich an diese Dinge.

Und ja natuerlich liebe ich Dich! :)

Angela said...

By the way, your manslation was hysterically funny, and amazingly accurate....keep them coming!

McLuvin said...

I like that you know when a situation is horrible and bolt - cut your losses and leave. The worst is staying in a bad situation, trying in vain to make the best of it.

That manslation was spot-on, as usual! So, true: buy your own food - ROFLMAO!