Open Letter

Dear Man I Just Cancelled A Date With,

You are a very good looking man, and you seemed nice at first. I didn't cancel on you because I am shallow. If I were shallow, I would've put up with you because you're eye candy.

I cancelled on you because you broke way to many of the "dating rules."

1.) While we are talking, please do not ask me how much I weigh. You're a dude, so when you volunteer your weight, that doesn't mean that I am going to just volunteer mine in return. Chicks are sensitive about this, how could you not know ? I don't know how your mother didn't teach you.

2.) After talking on the phone for only the second time, I wasn't ready to hear about your recovering alcoholic father and how he relapses and how he demands your time. On that note, I also wasn't ready to hear about your 2 alcoholic friends who ruined their lives, one of which went to prison for driving drunk on highway 17 and almost killing a child. WTF ????

I am sorry about your father, but you do realize that you have the ability to chose your friends and surround yourself with positive people, don't you ? Well, if you don't, then we shouldn't hang out.

While we're on this, it's not that I am a shallow, uncaring bitch. I do care if you have problems. But shouldn't you slowly reel me in with your award winning personality and get me emotionally attached to you before you start divulging your skeletons ?

3.) When arranging the date with me and chosing a bowling alley, either chose one and tell me you're taking me there OR let me chose and be fine with my choice. But please don't tell me to make my choice and then complain about the price of the place I chose.

Yes, I chose the more expensive bowling alley that is newer and looks like a night club. But it's only bowling, and I wasn't going to eat much anyway. It's not like I was going to order a lobster. We were going to rent ugly shows and hold 8 pound balls together.

I found it very tacky that you had to mention that it's only $2.50 after 9pm. Where was your mother when you started dating ? Apparently she wasn't around to stop mistakes like this from happening.

I also found it very strange that you got offended when I proceeded to offer to pay for my half. You got so offended that you told me to shut up and strongly said that you are NOT cheap and that you are a gentleman.

I said yes, you're such a gentleman that you just told me to shut up. You didn't like that, but hey, it was true.

You also got mad when I told you to just forget about it, and that you should find someone else. You wanted to know why I didn't give "us" a chance.

Hahahaha, we just talked, and I wasn't aware that there was a relationship. When you proceeded to tell me that I wasn't treating you right, I said that you didn't deserve that treatment from me and that you should just go and find someone to treat you better.

I admit, I said that to get you off my back, but it worked.

Best of luck to you out there :)