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Friday, January 16, 2009

I just couldn't help myself.........

This entry is partly inspired by Mike, since he has another blog dedicated to weird profiles people have on the personals sites.

Sometimes I like to peruse personals for pure entertainment. This posting which I snagged off a site isn't really weird, but oh so cliche and I feel like adding my two cents in capital letters. By the way, he is 30, and is a good looking guy,

Maybe I am cynical/jaded, or maybe I am being realistic. Here goes......


"Me and My Ideal Match"

My friends would describe me as fun, quick witted with a great sense of humor, loyal, humble, down to earth, and athletic. DAMN THAT'S A LOT OF ADJECTIVES, ARE YOU SURE THAT YOU DIDN'T SPRINKLE A COUPLE OF YOUR OWN IN THERE ? SO MUCH FOR HUMBLENESS. BESIDES, YOUR FRIENDS MAY FIND YOU HILARIOUS, BUT ARE YOU SURE THE REST OF THE WORLD IS LAUGHING WITH YOU ?

I love acting, movies/theater, art, wine, food, and traveling when I get the chance. I love learning new things. I can be goofy at times and love slapstick humor, yet sophisticated and like to have intelligent conversations at other times. OKAY, YOU CAN SPELL, WHICH IS NICE. BUT IF YOU HAVE TO SAY THAT YOU LOVE INTELLIGENT CONVERSATIONS, THEN MAYBE YOU AREN'T THAT SOPHISTICATED AT ALL, MON AMIE.....

I have worked and done many things that have taught me more about who I am and what I like. I am very driven and have goals set that I will achieve. I believe life is what you make of it and that you can create almost anything you dream. BLAH BLAH BLAH..... I AM JUST SPRINKING WORDS OF WISDOM IN HERE TO MAKE IT APPEAR THAT I AM A DEEP THINKER, WHEN I REALLY JUST WANT TO GET INTO YOUR PANTS.

I play in a softball league with some friends when I get the chance. I enjoy sports and going to games like most guys. If I watch TV it is usually comedy central or the history channel. I love watching movies and snuggling when it rains WHERE I WILL PRESSURE YOU TO PUT OUT, or even heading out to the hot tub with a bottle of wine and relaxing WHERE I WILL MOST DEFINITELY TRY TO BANG YOU. I really just like to have a good time and am capable of having fun doing almost anything. I WILL ACT LIKE I AM HAVING FUN WATCHING THAT CHICK FLICK WITH YOU BECAUSE I WILL EXPECT YOU TO REWARD ME BACK.

I am a bit of an old fashion guy that likes to open doors for a woman and am romantic, but looking to make friends with someone first before that chivalry side comes out. BASICALLY, I WANT TO BANG YOU FIRST BEFORE I DECIDE TO TREAT YOU WITH THE RESPECT THAT YOU DESERVE.
HAHA, "CHIVALRY SIDE". SO MUCH FOR BEING SOPHISTICATED. DON'T YOU MEAN YOUR CHIVALROUS SIDE ?


OKAY, SERIOUSLY, DUDE.... TRUE CHIVALROUS MEN DON'T NEED TO MENTION THAT THEY OPEN DOORS AND BE ROMANTIC, BECAUSE IT'S PART OF WHO THEY ARE.

I think open communication and honesty are a very important, and of course chemistry.
ACTUALLY, CHEMISTRY IS THE MOST IMPORTANT THING, IF I AM NOT ATTRACTED TO YOU, THEN FORGET THE OTHER TWO.......

Now about you: Smart, fun, great sense of humor and a little bit goofy at times, yet sophisticated and classy at other times. HAHA, AS SOPHISTICATED AS YOU ? You like to learn new things, like being active and healthy, but at the same time enjoy relaxing on the coach and watching movies, as well as going out to a sports game, or some sort of outdoor activity. If you like sushi...that's a big plus.

4 comments:

Mike said...

You're welcome (bows). Nice translation.

Winivere said...

LOL @ cracking up here. Sounds as if this is what we think we want to hear.
XX

Winivere said...

oops... as if this is what HE thinks we want to hear.

Big Mark 243 said...

Too funny ... but I wonder what a translation of a female profile would read like!