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Tuesday, January 27, 2009

What I Miss...................

-I miss being in my early twenties

-I miss being naive as I used to. Back then I still wasn't aware of the full intentions of men, and what they say and how they act are different.

-I miss my optomistic outlook I used to have, even when I was sad. I picked myself up faster and tried harder.

-I still can't believe that I backed up all my possessions and lived alone in Barcelona, a city that I knew nothing about. I think about that year all the time.

- I miss going to the beach late at night, I miss motorcyle rides on the mountain, I miss meeting new people all of the time from all over the world. I miss buying the latest CDs for a Euro on the street from the Africans.

-I miss being homesick with people that were also away from their countries. I got homesick with Colombians, Argentinians, Dominicans, Brits, Germans, Americans......

- I miss being able to trust people easily. I was never afraid of meeting up with someone over there, like I am over here.

- I feel like time is passing me by so fast, and I wish I could travel again. I don't feel like I've gotten it out of my system.

- Thank God I am still unmarried with no children.

2 comments:

Big Mark 243 said...

You know young lady ... you get me to thinking reading your journal, and this one is a thought provker right here.

You are still young enough to have an adventure filled life, period. You may have to make some difficult choices, but you can still get out and get into it.

I understand about how you feel about Barcelona. I have done something similiar before, and I hope that my move to Nebraska will be my last one ... and when I was younger, I looked back on those times with a wistfulness. Reminded me of the Frost poem, 'The Road Not Taken'. When you are young and thoughtful, you get that feeling alot.

Time is passing you by, but you can control it by working towards your goals, and deciding what you want most, and going toward that. Forget a lot of the other stuff that falls off of your life, because it means it (or 'who') does not factor into the person you will become.

The last line in your entry shows you DO have an understanding of perspective. Deepen that understanding, and go forward from it. You are smart, beautiful, and you have the opportunity of a lifetime, becuase you can make and live the life you want.

Before I forget, you will NEVER be able to shake the naivete about men. It comes down to trust at a certain point. You will have to believe in a cat and let go of all the bias and the heartbreak and fear. I do think he should inspire you to do this, that he brings something into your life, and you feel that you want to let him in.

But even at that point, you will face uncertainty. Trust yourself and the lessons you have learned in your life. And I will hope for you, wherever you are, with whoever, that you have found the person you can depend on. Nothing is of more value in a person than being able to depend upon someone. No exception.

Winivere said...

Gran*pa always sai*:

If you are still alive, there is always hope.

Growing means leaving some things behin*, but what you are *oing now is important. We all have to *o what we have to *o in or*er to *o what we WANT to *o. LOL @ hope you can un*erstan* all that without the lette I *on't have.

By the way, I miss the letter *. LOL

XX