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Sunday, July 19, 2009

Thats a whole bag of douche

Hi Kittens,

I present to you the douche of the day, "manslations" are in bold as usual.

Kisses !




Title: DO NOT READ THIS IF YOU ARE INTO HAVING FUN !/ 40 y/o

Reply to: pers-ptccv-1277167292@craigslist.orgDate: 2009-07-18, 6:25PM

OK - You passed the test ! You are both rebelious and fun ! I don't follow directions well, either Not only will you have to stop for directions, you will have to drive the car. Hugs not drugs ! Hippy love I love to cook, and watch movies. I am low maintenance, and I love to laugh ! I figure if I sound like a chick, I can bang one faster. I can relate to a group of drug addicts better than I can relate to a group of wine tasters. No really, I used to be in rehab. I'd rather watch movies than sports All that pot turned me into a lazy sloth. I can feel alone while being surrounded by a group of people because people are tired of my behaviour and leave me alone to talk to the voices I hear. I think of sex 80% of my day as I have a sizeable porn collection. My drummer thinks I'm odd, and strange, not because I think of sex all the time, but because, well I'm not sure exactly why it's because I tried to show him my penis. I take it as a compliment but he surely didn't. I am a loyal friend, a good cook, fun, and once I let you into my life, I wear my heart on my sleeve I will latch on to you and never let go because you will be all I have, my cooking is barely tolerable. I'm told I'm handsome thats what I thought I heard while I was flying high as a kite. No drugs please my sponsor told me to say that. SEND me your pic along with the name of your town even though I didn't send you one. This weeds out the auto response ads that we all hate ! Yes, I'm real a real 40 year old with hippy stink.

2 comments:

PorkStar said...

lmao...

fucking retard, on this day and age and they still pretend to get chics that way? Fucking losers...

Good thing you pound on them chica.

Frequent Traveler said...

heh-heh-heh... I LOVE these translations :)